Category: Suicide

I don’t know always know what happens after

struggle

People who read this page (trigger warning), often ask about Debbie.

Debbie is from the UK and she’s become something of a celebrity since she comes back to share on that page when she is struggling which I’m so thankful for. Many ask how she is doing. As of this writing, Debbie is still alive to the best of my knowledge.

I honestly have no way of knowing what happens to any of the commenters unless that person comes back to the site and lets me know. Many have and I am honored when they do. I think … Read more...

Have you lost someone to suicide in the last five months?

by Noam Schneck, PhD
Assistant Professor, New York State Psychiatric Institute/Columbia University

We hope that you will be able to join our mission of helping people grieving suicide.

The Survive Together Research Study at New York State Psychiatric Institute/Columbia University Department of Psychiatry is looking for people who are grieving a loss by suicide in the past 5 months. By joining our study you will help us learn how to help others who have lost a loved one to suicide.

You can participate even if you do not live near NYC. If interested, please contact schneck@nyspi.columbia.edu for further details. You … Read more...

Overwhelmed, Defeated and then Excited

I felt that way in that order today.

I’m in at a small writer’s conference in Brooklyn, New York called SLICE. While I know a ton about marketing and social media having owned a digital marketing company, the publishing world is completely new and I needed to really immerse myself here to get the lay of the land.

I wanted to yell in the morning. There are queries, pitches and then a proposal and I’m not sure what goes in any of this stuff. I have drafts of all of the above but I feel lost. I’m also not up … Read more...

Scarlet Draws

by Timothy Donald

Scarlet draws and fallen tears

With all my pain and all my fears

I’ve wasted oh so many years

How did I end up right back here

Please don’t leave me. Yes, I’m fiending

All so haunting are my demons

So I lived without a reason

On this track my soul starts bleeding

So I’m fighting and I’m trying

Said there’s lust that’s no denying

I get sick I’m trowing up

And then I start to feel like dying

Feel my heart and yes it’s crying

Needed you but b*tch I’m lying

Needed God now I’m not … Read more...

Glad my life didn’t end so I would not miss the dance

by Tammy Ozolins

My favorite song of all time is called The Dance by Garth Brooks it has a lot of meaning to me.

First, it reminds me of a special friend of mine, Brian, but we called him Rini. He and I would dance at the various dances we had at school. We were very close and shared a lot of memories –school, parties etc.

Unfortunately, he took his own life on February 20, 1996, a day after my twin’s and my birthday. My twin brother was good friends with him as well and now all I have left … Read more...

You are an emotionally naked badass if…

You talk openly (without whispering) on taboo subjects related to mental illness, addiction, suicide or grief

You lost a loved one to suicide and get out of bed every morning

You lost loved one to overdose and manage to brush your teeth daily

You lost a child to any cause of death and you joined a support group

Thoughts of suicide are something you live with and you have reached out for help

You survived a suicide attempt and went back to school or work

You have a mental illness and you have a job (any job)

You are in … Read more...

What’s it like to cold call parents whose children have killed themselves?

Micheal Wilson was faced with this when he wrote an article about a therapeutic boarding school Charles attended.

He called a number of parents. I was one of them. He found me through this blog.

I didn’t think about it when he called me. I just wanted to share my experience. It was only after when he called me back that he shared how uncomfortable it was calling all those parents who were devastated. It’s an interesting story and I appreciate that I got to share some of mine.

Read the story in the New York Times Insider 

Join us

… Read more...

Do you have an inspirational quote to share?

Sharing this today because it hit me that this is a quote I live. Sometimes when you are struggling, a good quote helps reset your brain.

Here are some of my other favorites.

“I can’t change the direction of the wind, but I can adjust my sails” –James Dean

“Well-behaved women seldom make history.” –Marilyn Monroe

“Even in darkness, sometimes sunshine shines through the blinds.” –Charles Aubrey Rogers

Do you have a favorite quote that inspires you? Share it if you do.

My favorite of Charles’ quotes
… Read more...

New York Times: The Family Foundation School

A group of kids from the Family School go paintballing one Saturday

Not long ago, I was interviewed by Michael Wilson for an article for the New York Times. He was investigating the Family Foundation School, the therapeutic boarding school where Charles attended in 2012. A teacher in New York had died from overdose in the bathroom who had attended the school which left bread crumbs back to the Family School.

In 2015, Charles was one of three deaths of alumni from the school that happened consecutively. Liz was first on May 31, 2015 and hers was an overdose. Followed … Read more...

The stickers that made me cry

Godwin has a club called No Eagle Left Behind (NELB), a group focused on mental wellness.

The group meets weekly and plans different events and projects focused on kindness, inclusiveness and mental health awareness including topics on addiction. They also practice yoga and mindfulness.

It’s a student led group facilitated by a counselor or a teacher. Decisions are made by the group and the club was the brain child of Leigh Dunavant, the principal at Godwin who didn’t want to see another teenager die by suicide or overdose. Not that this is a guarantee to insulate a school from disaster … Read more...

Ben’s poem

by Ben

Ben is a 17-year-old who suffers from depression and suicidal ideation and contributed this to emotionally naked to express how he feels. 

I wish I had a knife to carve this hollow soul,
something to make this life feel whole,
even when the world grows dull,
but even as dark as it seems,
these nightmares are dreamt like dreams

Verse for the Lonely – by Charles Aubrey Rogers
… Read more...

Honor your Loved one. Memorial Emotionally Naked T-Shirts

emotionally naked t-shirt and sweat shirts

XS-3XL, Blue, White, Gray. Unisex and Women’s Slim fit. T-shirts are here.

In honor of suicide prevention month in September, I am doing t-shirts and sweat shirts next month to remember lost loved ones who died by suicide. If you want your loved one remembered and that name added to the back of this shirt, please fill out this form. It’s free to have a name put on the shirts but only names added to the form will be on the shirt.

I respect your privacy.  I will not be selling the form contents or otherwise sharing your … Read more...

Trained in Youth Mental Health First Aid

Because I give so many presentations on the topic of mental illness, addiction and suicide, I have engaged in many training sessions to become more educated on evidence-based practices.

So now I’ve added Youth Mental Health First Aid. Thank you Kathy Harkey at NAMI Central Virginia who provides training on a number of mental health and suicide prevention trainings in Central Virginia. Most of you can also take these trainings and there are also certified peer support trainings for both mental illness and Substance Use Disorder. The latter would be for those with lived experience.

Here are my current certifications

… Read more...

All this noise

Me: Some days I think, “How will I ever get through to people?” No one can hear me. I just feel drowned out.

Alter Ego: Everyone feels that way.  

Me: I know that. But I feel that way today, damn it. 

Alter Ego: So what do you want a pity party? 

Me: No. I just want to be heard. I keep pushing and pushing and pushing. I feel like I’m yelling but the crowd around me drowns me out and it makes me feel like my message is just not important. 

Alter Ego: You know there is so much noise … Read more...

Ride to Stop Suicide 2018. And unexpected news

Anne Moss, Leslie, Casey, all Beacon Tree board members

Last year a motorcycle group called Pipehitters Union Motorcycle Club-Regulators Chapter found Beacon Tree online and asked if we were interested in a fundraiser? They liked that we supported the cause of youth suicide prevention and wanted to support someone local. What nonprofit doesn’t like when someone does a fundraiser? Especially when they do all the work. And I mean they do the work–Sponsors, prizes, food, planning etc. Best guys to work with hands down and it was a match made in heaven. I instantly took to them. Their significant others, too. … Read more...