That picture that prompts tears

Some pictures capture the very essence of my youngest child and his playful nature. This is one of them. I just can’t believe that child on the left suffered from depression and killed himself.

How did his brain shift from happy to “I need to kill myself.” It’s when I look back sometimes it seems so unbelievable. I wish I could have kept them young and innocent.

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I never asked, ‘why me?’

Picture credit: City Church

You’d think that after losing a son to suicide, that would be my go-to feeling. Why wasn’t it?

I’m not telling you this because I think I am more “noble” than someone else. I’m not. In fact, I wondered if I might be abnormal. Which is possible.

One is that I wasn’t raised in a household where my family made me think of religion as an investment or type of insurance that would earn me extra protection from God in the future. And over the years, I found myself feeling grateful–grateful that I was not exposed … Read more...

Three digit number for suicide prevention

An FCC Report is recommending that the ten-digit suicide prevention lifeline, 1-800-273-8255, be shortened to the easier to remember three-digit number, 988. The FCC report says the current number for the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline was called more than 2.2 million times in 2018.

The agency found that in making a change, 988 could be implemented more quickly than repurposing an existing three-digit N11 code like 511 or 611. 

Along with that recommendation is that the call center be adequately funded. Smaller call centers are having to close due to lack of funding at a critical point when suicide rates … Read more...

Confessions of a teenage addict

by AC Osberg

I had my first drink of alcohol when I was 12 and smoked my first joint at the same age. I did feel like I had to at the time because I wanted to fit in. Fitting in is so important to preteens and teens it is just the way their brains are wired. 

At this stage in life I felt like I needed to know who I was and to get away from the control of my parents. I felt like my world was opening up and was able to see my family for what it was—messed … Read more...

How I found my laugh after loss

It had been two days since Charles’ death and my kitchen was packed with people. I was so grateful that all our friends and neighbors knew to come over. From 11am-5pm every day for seven days, our house was filled.

The three hours I spent the day after with just my husband and myself after Charles’ suicide in what seemed like a cavernous house was unbearable. I needed others in the room to absorb some of the overwhelming grief–grief that took me to my knees multiple times per day.

On that second day, standing in the kitchen with friends and … Read more...

When will you see the book cover?

Book Description: The funniest, most popular kid in school, Charles Aubrey Rogers, suffered from depression, addiction, and died by suicide. Diary of a Broken Mind focuses on the relatable story of what lead to Charles’ suicide at age twenty and answers the “why” behind his addiction and this cause of death, revealed through a mother’s story and years of his published and unpublished song lyrics. The last several chapters focus on hope and healing and how the author found her purpose and forgave herself.

So here’s the rough timeline for the book release:

Aug. 24: Book announcement online, along with …

Suicide prevention: How to ‘remove means’ when it’s a gun

Lock and Talk is part of a comprehensive approach to suicide prevention in Chesterfield County being implemented by the Chesterfield Suicide Awareness and Prevention Coalition in partnership with Chesterfield County Mental Health Support Services and Virginia Department of Behavioral Health and Developmental Services. I am part of the suicide coalition.

The goal is to:

  • Prevent suicides by restricting access to firearms, medications, and other potentially dangerous items during a mental health crisis
  • Educate the community about how to recognize and respond to warning signs of suicide

This is not an appeal to change current second amendment laws but an initiative for … Read more...

Raising children in a digital world

Parenting is not and has never been an easy job. Each generation poses new challenges that the generation before has not faced. Raising children in today’s digital environment throws curve balls and introduces issues that are unprecedented. In addition, the digital and technology changes so fast, faster than any other times in our lives.

I was raising my two boys when the digital age literally moved in and the world of parenting shifted on its axis. I remember looking at my youngest son as he celebrated the acquisition of his first flip phone and remember thinking, “Will we regret this? … Read more...

Jilly’s hearts —#griefheart number 293

These are my grief socks and it’s an odd comfort to wear them. These were given to my daughter, Jilly, at Christmas. We have a tradition of buying everybody crazy socks.

Jilly hadn’t even worn these yet. It took my heart back when I saw them. Because when I found them I had already seen the symbol on Anne Moss’ e-book.

Jilly is my daughter who died by overdose. And this #griefheart is in her memory.

Note from Anne Moss: I’ve not posted a #griefheart in a while and some of you may not know of this project. But Read more...

Tom Bannard on the Podcast, Atheists in Recovery

Atheists in Recovery podcast addresses the spiritual and scientific belief systems of people in long term recovery in order to deconstruct limiting thought patterns, and introduce new behaviors and routines you can use. It is hosted by my friend Adina Sylvestri, the founder at Life Cycles Counseling with 14 years of counseling experience.

She specializes in treating women with substance abuse issues, individuals struggling with anger management, and helping children who have experienced trauma lead full and healthy lives.

This podcast features Tom Bannard, CADC, MBA, the Program Coordinator for Rams in Recovery at Virginia Commonwealth University. Tom is … Read more...