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How can I love someone who is dead?

love someone who has died

Maybe there are times you have talked about your loved one who died and gotten the question, “Don’t you think you should have moved on from all that by now?”

The truth is, a child or a person’s death does not erase them from our family tree or our friend group.

And just because they are not with us on earth, doesn’t mean we stop loving them, thinking about them, or missing them. I buried my child not his memory or my love for him. So why do people who’ve never been through a devastating loss want to pass judgment … Read more...

Podcast: A Mother’s Grief Journey After Losing Her Son to Suicide with Anne Moss Rogers

podcast guest on suicide

Show notes

We talked a lot about specific strategies for the “what ifs” and “coulda woulda shouldas” that come from having lost a child.

  • Listen in as we talk about:
    • [3:00] Who Anne Moss’s son Charles was
    • [4:20] Charles’ struggle with drugs and depression
    • [5:45] How Anne Moss navigated her son’s struggles
    • [10:20] Fighting for her son’s health with medical professionals
    • [19:55] Learning how to get information from her son in a kind and empathetic way
    • [22:15] Finding out her son had died
    • [26:20] Choosing to find the gift in Charles’ death, and grieving in her own way
    • [35:40] What
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One can never predict the future. Or change the past.

by Liza Sierra

Trigger Warning: Strong emotional content and suicide method referenced. If you are in crisis, text “help” to 741-741 or call 988

John Michael Carrington, 12/27/1984 – 05/07/2018

At 17, I enjoyed loud music, hanging with friends, and like any other teenager, online chatrooms. One day I got a message from a guy who was 19, single, and from the U.K! I was completely fascinated by him, being that I’m from Texas.

We exchanged pictures, and phone numbers and we both got into so much trouble for running up our parent’s phone bills back then. (Sorry Mom). It … Read more...

10 Steps to Finding Your Purpose

Click the yellow title to get your 2-page ebook.

10 Steps to Finding Your Purpose

Length: Two pages (maybe the spiral notebook look is overkill)

Finding purpose is how you add meaning to your life. It can be a business venture, passion project, or social justice pursuit. It doesn’t have to be grand and international. It can be simply promoting a cause in a meaningful way. These are the steps I took to find my purpose and I hope these steps help you find yours.

Read more...

Charles would be 27 today, April 26, 2022

My son Charles was an artist — an actor, comedian, rap artist, and an amazing writer. In short, he was a creative genius and he would have been 27 years old today. He suffered from depression and addiction and died by suicide seven years ago. And yes we have birthday parties for our son in heaven.

Charles loved birthday parties. When he was little he’d start planning months in advance for his. It drove us crazy. But now I miss what drove me mad even though I did think it was so precious. He didn’t love parties because of the … Read more...

Podcast. L.E.A.P: Listen, Engage, Allow and Process on Your Healing Journey 

See the website here. Susan E. Casey is a grief expert and therapist who wants to help people find the light in grief. In this episode, you can join the conversation with a mother, Rebecca, whose son died from an accidental overdose, and how she is finding a path forward a year after her son’s recovery and shocking overdose.

Susan and I met a few years ago when I was writing Diary of a Broken Mind and she was writing Mining for Joy in the Deep River of Grief which is about sibling grief. She was my “beta reader” and … Read more...

Are the ‘what ifs’ and ‘coulda woulda shouldas’ stalking you?

Does your brain gets stuck in self-blame mode?

Do the what-ifs and coulda wouldas shouldas stalk you? I have some strategies that won’t magically make the pain vanish but they will lessen your suffering and help you find some peace.

Some examples of ‘what ifs’

Since I lost my son to suicide, my issue was going down that rabbit hole of coulda woulda shouldas which sounded like this–

“Why didn’t I answer the phone that one last time?”

What if I had gone and picked him up when his voice expressed obvious despair?”

“Why didn’t I call him every … Read more...

Podcast: Anne Moss Rogers on Todd Inspires Beliefcast

Todd Inspires Beliefcast with Todd Sylvester is for those looking to get more out of life, move beyond limiting beliefs and overcome addictions, depression, and anxiety. This one is trending as one of the top 1% of mental health podcasts worldwide.

We invite you to be in this interview to laugh, cry, and grow together.

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The girlfriend

Charles had a girlfriend named Susanna. (Name changed to protect privacy.) Between the two of them, their weight would add up to one average human. So yeah they were both thin people. While he did love her I don’t think he was an awesome boyfriend. Those with substance use disorder rarely are because their addiction makes them desperate and selfish. Deep down that was not who Charles was.

She had gotten clean by the time Charles had relapsed after his first recovery so it was a lopsided relationship at that point with Susanna acting as his primary transportation and everything … Read more...

Transforming pain after your child dies

by Tamara Harvey Braswell

When my 19-year-old son Logan died in a car crash more than five years ago, I soon became engulfed in a new relationship called Grief.  I capitalize the word because I consider Grief more than a word.  Grief is a gut puncher, water-filled lungs, blinding head banging pain that holds a person hostage.

That’s how Grief feels at first.  I am talking about traumatic Grief – the kind of Grief that drowns a parent in sorrow and despair when he or she loses a child, whether the death be from a sudden cause, such as an … Read more...

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