Dirty driveway heart— #griefheart number 246

Oil slick heart

My sister-in-law?s sister sent me this. It was taken in Florida at my in-law?s condo. That was where Charles went with his grandparents a few hours before going to detox as a result of opiate withdrawal. At that point, none of us knew he was addicted to heroin. So you can imagine the shock read more

Flock of love— #griefheart number 245

Flock of love

I look at the sky a lot.

The clouds, in particular, are soothing to me since Charles’ suicide. I’m always amazed at how much entertainment is up there.

These birds formed a heart in New Mexico and Katherine caught it with her camera. It made me think of that Hitchcock movie, ?The read more

Giannini’s heart— #griefheart number 244

Giannini’s heart

Diane lost her son to suicide on March 29, 2017 and this #griefheart is in honor of Joshua?s struggle with addiction and depression, like my son Charles. At this writing, she is struggling with those initial stages of grief?fog, shock, and disbelief. I remember this stage. I was so confused read more

Jerky heart— #griefheart number 243

Jerky heart

Charles loved beef jerky almost as much as he loved wings. Teriyaki being his favorite flavor.

Whenever I walk past a bag of beef jerky I think about him. I stand there, stuck in a stare at a snack bag. Funny, how such simple things jerk my heart strings and trigger random memories about my child read more

Connected heart— #griefheart number 242

Connected heart

A new friend in the neighborhood had me and two other ladies for dinner tonight. She had sent me this heart previously, having seen it in Chickahominy which is in Hanover, Virginia. Three of the four of us at dinner lost a child to suicide. It?s always nice to be able to talk openly on the subject read more

Stalking heart— #griefheart number 241

Stalking heart

All week, those Mother’s Day ads, hearts, balloons, flowers, greeting cards have stalked me where ever I go. It’s hard not to see them as reminders of my chid that it no longer here.

The week was brutal. It’s only better now because I have my oldest with me now.

So remember friends read more

Poop heart— #griefheart number 240

Poop heart

People are truly seeing hearts everywhere! This one from Alex’ horse.

Charles would absolutely love this. He would think it was hilarious. So that?s why it?s here. And poop jokes? Good God boys start snickering about poop jokes at age 2. When do they get old? Never. Boys and men love read more

Bonfire heart— #griefheart number 239

Bonfire heart

Charles loved having people over for a bonfire. And I loved it when we had all his friends over. I always felt better when he and all the kids were at my house then I could catch up with them, too.

One time he decided to bring the fire pit onto the deck. By the time, I came out to do my ?friend read more

Cookie cutter heart— #griefheart number 238

Cookie cutter heart

Charles was the farthest thing from “cookie cutter” and he hated the phrase “politically correct.”  He could be pretty out there in terms of his point of view. He was a crazy idealist who had a perfect solution on how to fix social injustice. It was part of his charm.

I loved read more