When my 19-year-old son Logan died in a car crash more than five years ago, I soon became engulfed in a new relationship called Grief. I capitalize the word because I consider Grief more than a word. Grief is a gut puncher, water-filled lungs, blinding head banging pain that holds a person hostage.
That’s how Grief feels at first. I am talking about traumatic Grief – the kind of Grief that drowns a parent in sorrow and despair when he or she loses a child, whether the death be from a sudden cause, such as an … Read more...
When the news of COVID-19 first hit China, I watched with concern, but life continued as normal. When the news hit Italy, that got a little closer to home because Italy is one of my favorite vacation places. Then the virus started to spread like wildfire in the U.S.
The news was about to become personal when the first few cases were reported in Colorado, where I live.
I never thought in a million years I would be homebound, working remotely every day, rarely going out, and wearing a facemask when I did. I NEVER … Read more...
Where was God when my 19-year-old son Logan died from severe bleeding and broken bones hours after he slammed his truck into a tree? I think God went on vacation that summer morning and left no miracles behind, at least not for Logan and me. Against my will, my soul was deposited on the grief trail, a journey no parent should ever have to experience…but many of us do.
Even the most perfect of parents and best of kids draw the short stick in life and bad things happen. I used to have … Read more...
Certain holidays and life events can offer challenges to those of us who have experienced the loss of loved one or co-worker. While occasions like Christmas or a wedding time is supposed to be happy and festive, the bereaved feel anything but that. We are a special group of people who manage to get up in the morning, put one foot in front of the other and push through despite our grief.
I know this is a strange subject for a mom who lost her only son to a car crash. How could anyone think about “clutter,” much less write about it in the same blog post about her deceased child? Read on.
It started with the kitchen chairs.
Grief gets you in all sorts of way. It can take a life of its own and in the beginning Grief is unrelenting and out of control. It comes in many forms. Anger is one of Grief’s many sidekicks.
Less than a month after my 19-year-old son Logan died, … Read more...
I will never forget the date, 5:30 a.m., July 22, 2016. My 19-year-old son Logan was pronounced dead in a Virginia hospital. Every bone in his body broken, bleeding from the inside out. His eyes black, his head swollen, his blonde hair blood stained from fatal injuries that literally crushed him when he took the street curve too fast and slammed his truck head on into a tree less than a half mile from our home.
I would never again hear him say, “I love you mom,” or feel that rush of excitement … Read more...
Getting complaints from neighbors of loud noise and craziness.
He did have some humdingers of parties in his day.
Wondering where he is…messing with drugs…receiving a call from jail to bail him out…hooking up with bad people who could take advantage of him…driving recklessly…and all those other nightmarish thoughts that haunt every parent, at one time or another, in middle of the night.
He’s not here to get in trouble.
Becoming deathly ill…struggling with depression and anxiety.
I remember when the Netflix series came out, “13 reasons Why.” I didn’t get past the preview, thinking I had enough real-life tragedy and wasn’t interested in immersing myself in such a sad story, regardless of the overarching messages it may have had.
I know death
I know what it is like to find the father of my child – my husband of years ago – dead from an overdose. Suicide was cause of death.
I know what it is like to whisper in my teenage son’s ear as he lies in ICU … Read more...