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Tag: the holidays hurt without the one you love

My second Christmas without my child

by Tamara Harvey Braswell

Tamara and Logan

I will never forget the date, 5:30 a.m., July 22, 2016. My 19-year-old son Logan was pronounced dead in a Virginia hospital. Every bone in his body broken, bleeding from the inside out. His eyes black, his head swollen, his blonde hair blood stained from fatal injuries that literally crushed him when he took the street curve too fast and slammed his truck head on into a tree less than a half mile from our home.

I would never again hear him say, “I love you mom,” or feel that rush of excitement … Read more...

Dear holidays, I hate you

Holidays are supposed to be festive and fun. But I’m not getting that vibe at all. You just bring me heaviness and grief. While people hustle and bustle about, I feel like I’m moving in slow motion. I just feel flat and lifeless. And sad.

Couldn’t you skip a year? This is my second holiday season and I still can’t seem to find my footing. I have a hard time finding motivation to do anything about Christmas at all. I just want it to go away.

I had hoped to be at the point of tolerating the Christmas holidays by … Read more...

Thinking of parents who have children still using or incarcerated this holiday

It’s a different kind of grief.

Knowing that the child you love is behind bars or in them. Still struggling with that demon known as addiction. There is a lot of stress in families this time of year that they are not the ‘Norman Rockwell’ painting of togetherness.

I remember how we’d discuss this every year in Families Anonymous. If our child was still using and not in recovery, this time of year was especially hard. For parents of those incarcerated due to their addiction, it was hard. While it’s definitely hard if you’ve lost a child, I don’t have … Read more...

The holidays hurt

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As early as August, Walmart was stocking the garden shelves with Christmas decor. I wanted to lodge a complaint. Those decorations were a threat and I felt offended.

Must they assault me with holiday tacky in August?

I couldn’t even find the garden clippers which end up being outside buried next to the fertilizer. But I could find a singing santa! That should help with fall gardening.

Like a tsunami, they’re coming whether I like it or not

And I can’t stop them. Can’t get a year off either.

I’d like to skip those two months and the pain of losing Charles by suicide that … Read more...