fbpx

Story from a Timeboy1408 fan

Timboy1408 video Cosby Gangsta Rap, 2008. Charles and Jacob

My name is Katherine and my friends and I used to watch your son, Charles on YouTube religiously when we were 13. Like every day, we were watching Timeboy1408 and would laugh until we couldn’t breathe.

A lot of our inside jokes were and still are things your son said in those videos. I’m now 25 years old and something made me think about those laughs we had so I went to see how he was doing. My heart broke when I saw that he had killed himself.

Recently, I’ve been … Read more...

Adam Paul Tilton, 1973 – 1993

Beloved Son and Brother

by Andy Tilton

“You are out of our reach, but not out of our hearts and minds.”

Mental Wellness begins with these words spoken out of necessity for a healthy recovery and mental healing:

Dear and Precious Adam,

As your father, I wish to express my brokenness and bitterness over your departure from our reach.

After searching my mind and heart, I am now ready to forgive you for leaving your sister, mother, and me so soon and without a word or explanation.

I have come to accept the fact that your pain was so severe … Read more...

Dear mother. You cannot reduce me.

by Jeannette, daughter of a narcissist and a psychologically abusive mother

You may see the title of this and think that it’s an attack…it’s not. It’s an opportunity for us to grow together and teach future generations to break the cycle-the cycle of narcissism. Restore empathy and unconditional love.

I am the child that so desperately wanted and needed your love. I needed you to show me my self-worth, and teach me how to maintain boundaries in order to survive this sometimes cruel and bitter world. You didn’t…

I am able to extend the empathy and unconditional love that … Read more...

My journey back to life after struggles with thoughts of suicide

by Graham

Dear Anne-

I’ve been meaning to mail you for a little while now. Last year, you really helped me when I hit a deep low with a very traumatic situation I was dealing with in my life. I was thinking about suicide because the mental and emotional pain I was in was so intense, and felt permanent like it was never going to ease or end.

I’ve learned a lot since then. Researched a lot about how I came to feel that way in the first place, and things I needed to do to recover. And slowly, very … Read more...

Gratitude letter

Dear Charles,

I’m grateful you were part of my life. If I had known from the beginning about your suicide at age 20, would I have chosen to have you as my child?

I’d like to think so. Knowing me, I would have thought I could have changed the course of destiny. Nevertheless, your life, as short as it was, transformed mine. And your death transformed it again. Everything is now categorized as before or after your death.

You helped me see outside of myself. You made me laugh and see the world from a whole different perspective. No one … Read more...

On Saturday night, a miracle happened

This note is published with permission from the parent who sent it. Her daughter also gave consent. Trigger warning: suicide attempt method mentioned.

My 27-year-old daughter had decided that the pain was too great, that she was a burden on everyone, and that since she was going to die anyway, might as well do it that night.

She went to google to find a site to learn how to hang herself. When she clicked on the link, she came to your site and a video with your son’s spoken word. It had such a big impact on her that she … Read more...

Letters from students are treasures

I love talking to students. My favorite part is what they learn about themselves–the moment when I read what everyone is going through and when the students recognize their classmates are dealing with some serious issues.

The post-it note interaction is such a simple exercise. But the discoveries we make together are not. I’m always shocked by what I read on those notes.

What’s more, so are the students.

Social anxiety, rape, murdered siblings or parents, anorexia and more. Some of these kids have lost several loved ones in the space of a year and they carry that with them … Read more...

It’s not shame you see in the eyes of your loved ones

To those with substance use disorder-

You see the faces of your loved ones when you use or relapse and you translate that look on their face as shame. Because you feel shame.

But it’s not that. It’s fear. We are gripped with mortal fear that you will die from substance use disorder.

We want to understand it as a disease. But it’s hard because it is so different from our usual definition of disease. We are not tempted to throw cancer patients out the door because we’ve had enough.

When you steal from us, we struggle not to be … Read more...

Paying it forward gives another hope

letter by Christopher Doyle

Scott Zebrowski died from overdose and a scholarship fund established by his twin sister, Jill, has given Christopher a chance at recovery

“About four months ago, I was in such a dark place that I wasn’t sure if I was going to make it out alive. To be honest, I wasn’t sure if I wanted to. Thirteen years of heroin addiction and failed attempts at getting clean had brought me to a place of such hopelessness and despair that giving up seemed like a viable option.

Scott Zebrowski didn’t die in vain. If his family can … Read more...

Dear Suicide

dear suicide

For years you stalked my son’s brain, took it hostage, lied to him and made him feel worthless and undeserving of life. At first he was frightened and confused but unwilling to tell us how much he hurt.

Because when you deposit pain you inject shame.

Charles didn’t understand because he didn’t know who you were, how unrelenting and convincing you could be, or how you’d come back over and over to torture him. Over time, you wore him down until he was desperate for solutions. He thought he found it when he first started using — marijuana and alcohol … Read more...

[class^="wpforms-"]
[class^="wpforms-"]
[class^="wpforms-"]
[class^="wpforms-"]
[class^="wpforms-"]
[class^="wpforms-"]
[class^="wpforms-"]
[class^="wpforms-"]
[class^="wpforms-"]
[class^="wpforms-"]
[class^="wpforms-"]
[class^="wpforms-"]
[class^="wpforms-"]
[class^="wpforms-"]