“About four months ago, I was in such a dark place that I wasn’t sure if I was going to make it out alive. To be hones, I wasn’t sure if I wanted to. Thirteen years of heroin addiction and failed attempts at getting clean had brought me to a place of such hopelessness and despair that giving up seemed like a viable option.
For years you stalked my son’s brain, took it hostage, lied to him and made him feel worthless and undeserving of life. At first he was frightened and confused but unwilling to tell us how much he hurt.
Because when you deposit pain you inject shame. Is that some kind of self-preservation on your part?
Charles didn’t understand because he didn’t know who you were, how unrelenting and convincing you could be, or how that you’d come back over and over to torture him. Over time, you wore him down until he was desperate for solutions. He thought he found … Read more...
Dear Mom and Dad, This letter to you is long overdue, and it took me a while to build the courage to write this to you two. First off, I want to thank you. Thank you for always being there and picking me up when I fell down.
You’ve invested so much time, sweat, pain, tears, and money trying to fix my mental health and addiction. You tried so hard until … Read more...
Note from his mother: “This is a letter my son Jared wrote to his friends before he died. He died from accidental overdose. Jared had given me the note a while back. He asked that I post it to his Facebook page. Through tears, I am sharing and awe fills my heart to have had the honor to be his mother.” Maureen Mahaney
To be posted to my Facebook – just in case (Please)
If you are reading this then the war is finally over. These words are mine and have been written as a half-baked last … Read more...
You all think of me as the worst possible human being– a drug dealer. Most of you invest all your hate and resentment for your loved one’s addiction on me.
Every arrest is celebrated like some progress has been made in the war on drugs. What a joke. All of us “dealers” are products of demand. Once one of us is arrested, or killed, hundreds more are there to take our place.
How did I end up a dirty drug dealer? I have a mom and a dad, a sister and a brother who love me. And they … Read more...
I roll in like a slow moving fog, smother your motivation and sit on your self esteem like it’s an old comfortable sofa. There may be no particular outside trigger and it might otherwise be a beautiful sunny day.
But inside your head it’s gray, damp and miserable.
Heaviness moves in and day after day, managing and enduring life is more of a challenge. When will it stop? When will it go away?
Oh but I’m not done.
Like a lightning bolt out of the sky, I can strike and bring on a moment of such intense pain, … Read more...