This will be our third Christmas without Billy. Sadly, I know too many people who are in the same boat, or are about to go through their first season without a loved one.
It has made me reflect back on how we got through, how we coped and came back up for air on the other side. I thought maybe some of the things I did (and still do) to get through might help someone else.
It’s the holidays and I had fun. I had no expectation that it would be.
After Charles’ suicide, I focused more on friends and family and less on stuff and decorations. It’s the connections that I need. Not more stuff. In fact, I can’t help but look around and want to purge some stuff .
It’s nice to be invited to things again. Our social life had dwindled when Charles struggled with drugs and alcohol and then it died when he did. Of course, it did. I didn’t want to spend quite that much time with myself, though. … Read more...
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So what is Grief Journey in a Jar?
You find/buy a container such as a jar, bag, or box for small notes with grief tips and … Read more...
This time of year, I move a little slower while every one else speeds up. I annoy easier, struggle to concentrate, and the grief is more pronounced.
This will be my fifth holiday since my son, Charles’, suicide. I’m not mulling over regrets or wondering why I missed the signs.
I just ache.
Even the Christmas carols drain my spirits. What’s more, I resent them. How does one get mad at a bunch of happy, peppy songs? But it feels they are ganging up on me, assaulting my senses and trying to force me to be merry and bright when … Read more...
So what is the right amount of time to be out of work after death of a child? That depends on the individual.
Loss of a child is a traumatic grief whether it’s suicide, overdose, death from cancer, or some other cause.
Parents who lose a child still have mortgages to pay and car payments to make. For many Americans, no work means no pay. So choice has little to do with how soon some people go back after a child’s death. Consider yourself fortunate if you do have choices.
It’s November already. Almost one year since my youngest daughter died by suicide during her first semester away at college. Even as I write those words, I have to pause and let them wash over me as though they are new words, as if this is a new grief.
I don’t think these words will ever settle down like old words. Not only does November hold the day of Eve’s death, but it is also Children’s Grief Awareness Month. A time when we, the grown-ups, are asked to pause, and to turn to the children, who … Read more...