Category: Suicide

Suicide Prevention T-Shirt

Some of the proceeds from this suicide memorial t-shirt will go to Beacon Tree Foundation which pays for childhood psychological evaluations not covered by insurance or medicaid when families can’t afford it and offers coping skills training to teenagers through the Preventure Program. Some of the proceeds to NAMI Central Virginia for their programs including support groups and training to prevent suicide.

This campaign has ended but you can still get an emotionally naked t-shirt.

Get Your T-Shirt

So you are contemplating suicide…
… Read more...

Article in Sober World

See my latest article in Sober World on Addiction and Suicide.

How Could I Wish it Had Been an Overdose?

My husband and I had just had dinner at a restaurant when he got a call on his mobile phone. The officer who called said they’d meet us in the parking lot and didn’t say what it was about. When they did arrive, I got in the back of the car, my husband in the front passenger seat, and the officer said, “I am sorry to deliver the sad news that your son, Charles, was found dead this morning.”

I … Read more...

Meeting humility face to face

Back in 2010 when things with my youngest son, Charles, started to go off the rails, I had to come face to face with my parental pride.

I had to readjust, accept, and alter my expectations. I had to face people who blamed our family’s problems on my unworthiness as a parent. I had to figure out how to come to terms with being the target of a lot of gossip and learn to dismiss it and focus on that which was more important.

Before then, I wonder how often I may have blamed parents for a child’s drug problem … Read more...

Facebook Depression

by Jon Farrow

I recently saw the story of Alexandra Valoras while watching the CBS Evening News. It is an incredibly tragic story. Alexandra’s story highlights that there can be overwhelming pain behind a smile. One part of the story caught my eye. CBS News referenced suicide statistics from the CDC when detailing Alexandra’s story.

The report released by the CDC showed that the suicide rate for males aged 15–19 increased 31% to 14.2 per 100,000 population by 2015. The rates for females doubled from 2007 to 2015 (from 2.4 to 5.1). The rate in 2015 was the highest for … Read more...

To those who think, ‘I’m not qualified to talk to someone who is suicidal’

It scares you when someone tells you they are thinking of suicide.  Or when you recognize the signs in social media. The fear sets in and you think you are not qualified. Because it freaks you out. It feels like a huge responsibility.

First, you are not supposed to fix this. For that, you are not qualified.

You are qualified to listen and talk, however.

They may say:

  • I’m such a burden
  • I can’t do this anymore
  • I feel so worthless
  • I feel so numb
  • No one would miss me if I was gone
  • I wish I were dead
  • I
… Read more...

“Mom, I have nothing.”

That phrase weighed heavy on my heart when Charles said it over the phone on Monday, June 1, 2015. The feeling it inspires now is the same–my own despair.

He had pawned his computer and his bike. He especially loved that bike and he never rode with a helmet. Funny, how I worried about a head injury when what I needed to worry about was the enemy living in his head.

The bike was just a possession but it was his last possession and I felt its significance. How desperate do you have to be to sell your last possessions? … Read more...

Remembering Christopher Bryan DeShields who died by suicide

by Raymond LeRoy Mason

Christopher Bryan DeShields
Christopher Bryan DeShields

My 23-year-old son, Christopher Bryan DeShields,  was a great young man. He suffered from schizophrenia and depression and lived in Raleigh, NC  but would come down to Charlotte, NC, on the weekends to spend time with me.

His favorite method of transportation was the Amtrak train. I still go up to the train station sometimes just to sit and wonder what it would be like if my son could get off of the train he normally rode.

His mother and I thought as he was getting older, he was getting better

But … Read more...

September is suicide prevention awareness month

So it’s September 23 and I’m now sharing the ribbon. (It’s also Recovery month as well.)

However, for Suicide Prevention Month, I posted the Emotionally Naked t-shirts to wear out and show your support.

Keep talking and sharing the posts, this ribbon. Because of you,  I’m hearing a lot from young people, especially, about how to tell a parent they have thoughts of suicide. So they want to tell and they are asking how which is good. 

Other related articles:

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Dear parents who think their child is just looking for attention

Your child had just told you they have thoughts of killing themselves. And your first reaction is to think all this is teen or young adult drama and you say, “You’re just trying to get attention.”

Please take it seriously when your son or daughter tells you they want to die and realize the courage it took to reveal the deepest darkest secret in their soul.

If you felt this way, would you find it easy to tell someone? Wouldn’t these thoughts scare you? A young man who is seventeen and suffers from thoughts of suicide told me … Read more...

Charles’ suicide wasn’t personal

Charles’ suicide felt intensely personal.

At first, I was sure it was because I sucked as a mom. Or that he was choosing to leave us.

I didn’t love him enough.

He didn’t love me enough.

I missed the signs.

I didn’t say the right thing.

I did nothing right.

His suicide was a crushing blow I took personally.

The truth is he didn’t do this to me.

He didn’t do this because of  me.

He did it to himself.

Which was beyond my control.

It’s so painful to know how he suffered and I had no idea.

I … Read more...

Sadness is not the enemy

fear of sadness

Sadness is one of those emotions people will take a detour of a hundred miles to avoid.

No one wants to hear about it. They don’t want to show it or experience it. They fear it and don’t even want to be near someone who suffers from it. Sometimes that means avoiding me since I am a walking reminder of a really terrible thing that happened. Death of a child. Even worse, a suicide.

There are articles on how to let go of sadness. Articles on how to “cure” it and even ones on how to turn sadness into what we … Read more...

Ben’s suicidal thoughts poem

by Ben

Ben is a 17-year-old who suffers from depression and suicidal ideation and contributed this to emotionally naked to express how he feels. 

I want to die,

I want to scream and cry,

these wings of wax allow me to fly,

but they melt in the sun’s glaring glow,

and I fall and drown in the ocean below.

Is my story is too ugly?
… Read more...

Emotional scars

light a candle for my child

Over time, the blunt force trauma of a Charles’ suicide has softened. The edges are not as sharp, the searing pain has become a persistent ache. He is still the first thing I think about in the morning and the last thing I think about at night. There are repeat episodes of intense pain but they are usually not as long lasting.

The wound is still there. It still aches, sometimes throbs, and even ruptures. Pictures can make me smile. Or they can make me cry. But overall, I have adjusted to my new life without my youngest son

Not … Read more...

Last call for memorial t-shirts, and comments about loved ones

This campaign is closed. But you can still get an emotionally naked shirt here.

We have 36 names so far. We can accommodate a few more. See what the shirts look like. Short sleeve, sweatshirt, unisex short sleeve, women’s slim fit. XS-3XL. Light blue, gray, white.

“We need to talk about it.”

“You’re never alone and are so loved
Mehdi taught me how to smile and find comfort in him through any situation. I wish he would’ve helped himself in the same way. I miss you, Jaff.” 💕

“We remember Maggie by the beautiful life she lead and not … Read more...

Keynote for Wellstone in Cullman, Alabama

keynote speaker mental health

I wish I could say I was the star of the event. Or maybe even the CEO, Jeremy or Chris, the COO. But no, the bread pudding was the real star. A lovely venue to boot.

I got to meet the family whose father was attacked by a man who was lost in psychosis, entered the family home and killed Stephen Griffith, an upstanding community lawyer. His wife was also attacked but is alive today.

In a remarkable turn of events, this family, in the midst of their grief recognized the man who attacked their father was mentally ill and … Read more...