She’s just trying to get attention

attentionseek

“She took all those pills just to get attention.”

“You know that phone call was just a cry for help.”

I have heard these phrases frequently as it relates to suicide attempts over the last few years.

Please never make the mistake of writing off a suicide attempt as “attention seeking.” Because a second attempt has a higher potential of completion.

What about when people are crying out for help? Then yes. That’s exactly what they are trying to get.

Attention.

How else do you get help? And why do we make asking for attention or crying for help such a negative thing?

Personally, I detest these phrases because it promotes keeping everything to yourself and suffering in silence which is precisely one of the reasons we are seeing more suicides.

Reaching out is not weak. It takes courage.

Suicide is an act of desperation by a person whose brain is telling them they need to seek ways to die. It’s usually the result of deep depression which is an illness.

So if someone is asking for attention, give it to them!

And please avoid phrases like “cry for help” and “she’s just trying to get attention” as it relates to suicidal ideation because they are dismissive comments. They shame and invalidate the feelings of the person suffering.

What’s more they discourage people who need it to avoid reaching out for help.

See the suicide resource page for more information from credible sources about suicide and how to handle a suicide situation.

Forgiving myself

Published by

Anne Moss Rogers

I am the mother of two boys and the owner of emotionally naked, a site that reached a quarter million people in its first 18 months. I am a writer and professional public speaker on the topics of suicide, addiction, mental illness, and grief and currently working on getting a book published. I lost my youngest son, Charles, 20, to suicide June 5, 2015. As talented and funny as Charles was, letting other people know they matter was his greatest gift. And now the legacy I try and carry forward in my son's memory.

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