Category: Suicide

Stop ‘should-ing’ yourself

After Charles’ addiction and suicide, I looked back with all the wisdom and all the facts of “after” and told myself I should have done something this way or that. I tortured myself with it. The coulda, woulda, shoulda consumed me for months and years.

I blamed myself for something I did, something I said, things I didn’t say or do. People tried to talk me out of it. They’d swear up and down that it wasn’t my fault. But that guilt baggage is part of the process of accepting the unfair end I’d been given.

But it’s not just … Read more...

Booking speaking engagements now

Creating a demo reel and should have my TEDx video in February. I sorely need video and that will be a focus in 2019.

Negotiating contracts now for spring and fall and if you know of an event looking for a speaker, do keep me in mind. See the speakers page for more info.

Karla Helbert, MS, LPC and I will be doing a Coping Strategies for Grief workshop at Ellwood Thompson locally in Richmond, VA in late February. Date to be announced soon. Checking on room availability and we will announce here and on our facebook pages.

And … Read more...

Buffalo plaid memories

Today, while packing away holiday stuff, I decided to consolidate Charles’ three boxes into two to make room. Some of the items have no memories attached. I actually sent a number of items to his friends after his suicide.

Still other articles of clothing carry strong memories–his blankie, the little leg cast from his fall down the stairs at eighteen months old. And this shirt. It’s what Charles wore the day he came home from rehab. He was scrubbed clean, beaming and so like the boy I remembered–the child that had been buried inside addiction just three weeks prior.

I … Read more...

Speaking at Pediatric Conference in Baltimore, MD

Exciting announcement.

I will be part of the presentation team with Lisa Horowitz, PhD from National Institute of Mental Health (NIMH) and Jeff Bridge PhD from The Research Institute at Nationwide Children’s Hospital. My part of the presentation is focused on story and utilizing social media and content marketing to prevent suicide.

When we submitted our proposal, Dr. Horowitz said that they don’t accept many proposals and it was only a slim chance. But we got in! This conference is a big deal and the number one conference for pediatrics. Over five thousand pediatricians go annually.

Our presentation focuses on … Read more...

Why should I stay alive when I want to kill myself?

by Anna Wieder

Dear Me who wants to die,

I know are you in so much pain right now. It feels unbearable and I am SO sorry. 

I know it feels like the pain will never end. 

It feels like it is crushing your spirit.

I know the terror you feel in your heart. The fear and panic feel like they are running through your arms and body, even piercing you like needles. 

I know everything in your brain might be fuzzy as your body sensations overwhelm you.

Stay here, in your body. BREATHE.

It is OK if it doesn’t … Read more...

Myth Busting Mondays coming soon

Starting in 2019, I am going to have one myth buster post on Mondays about the subjects we cover here. There are so many myths about grief, addiction, mental illness and suicide. Some still think addiction is the result of a moral failing and others believe if someone is thinking of suicide, you can’t change their mind. Both of those are not true.

There will be authors other than me covering these. And one of those authors could be you.

I would love some suggestions from you guys. What are some of the myths you hear?

Take the Quiz: Suicide
… Read more...

What if we thought of mental illness as a benefit?

The Evolutionary Advantages of Mental Illness | Frank King | TEDxRanneySchool

I always thought Charles’ talent was a gift that came with his mental illness. How many creative people suffer from depression, anxiety, addiction, or bipolar? This TEDx talk by Frank King makes you think about this premise.

Did Charles show signs of mental illness earlier in his life?
… Read more...

How I forgave myself for not taking Charles’ last call

Content warning: Strong Emotional Content.  

I have so many memories of Charles and 99.9% of them are amazing and most of the memories are of him just trying his best to put a smile on my face and get a little giggle out of me, which he would never fail to do. He was so special and he was my best friend and I loved Charles.

But there is one memory that sticks in my mind and bothers me a lot. I’m slowly learning how to deal with the emotions that come up when I talk about this subject so … Read more...

Three years since Nick’s suicide

by Sandy LaSalle

Three years ago, my world stopped when I learned my son, Nick, who so proudly graduated with a BS in Physics from VA Tech, was never coming home. How I miss him! I recall first hearing,
“Nick is deceased,” from my ex.

How do you go on? Thankfully I did not have to consciously make my heart beat, lungs breathe, else I would have forgotten. This year is the hardest. The numbness is gone. Full unadulterated pain takes its place.

I could not even find the energy to putting out Christmas decor. I am a … Read more...

Bad news. Good news

Strong emotional content and suicide method referenced. If you are in crisis, text “help” to 741-741 or call 988

Many of you know I have written articles here for the express purpose of showing up at the top of the Google when people are looking for ways to die. I often have asked you to share them to help them reach that destination and you have done that. There are about eight articles that are ranked on page one for this purpose including one video on YouTube. 

Last week, someone reached out to me who was struggling via the contact … Read more...

So how did it feel standing on the TEDx stage?

It felt freaking great. Someone asked me if I was glad it was over and I said, “No!” I loved that audience, my fellow speakers and I had a grand time. While back stage, we all felt nervous but I stared at the big red dot from the wings and I whispered to my fellow speakers, “We are not nervous, we are excited!” And I believed it.

Some of you were there live. Others saw the streaming video the next day which is taken down for now. But they will post the videos in a few weeks and I will … Read more...

A Gift of Grace. Faith helped me heal after my daughter’s suicide

by Charlotte Moyler

How faith helped me heal after my daughter's suicide by Charlotte Moyler
Charlotte Moyler

I am appreciative to Anne Moss for asking me to write about my faith before, during and especially after the death of my daughter. I write from my heart and an openness of my soul.

Many who suffer the loss of a child lose their faith. This actually makes a great deal of sense. How was my faith strengthened rather than weakened? Sense has nothing to do with it.

Sometimes in life, events occur that fracture the very foundation on which we stand. Our life, as we have known it, is forever changed and we … Read more...

#IfYouCouldSeeMe Podcast with Erin Mahone and Anne Moss Rogers

Honored to be on Erin Mahone’s podcast, #Ifyoucouldseeme focused on mental illness. At first the sound is distant but it improves. Support this podcast by subscribing.

58 minutes

Listen in iTunes

Listen on Podchaser

#ifyoucouldseeme podcast
I am that mom ‘whose child killed himself’

… Read more...

My mother’s suicide lives on in me

by Rebecca Thomas

Trigger warning: Suicide method mentioned briefly.  

Rosemary Jerjian
Rosemary Jerjian

In mid 2018, after Kate Spade and Anthony Bourdain died by suicide, it was their families I thought of almost immediately.

I know very well the lifetime of difficulty ahead for them.

My mother died by firearm when I was thirty-three. I try to tell people this as evenly as possible. As if it was an interesting fact of my life, and not a deep and central nerve–a thing woven into my flesh and bone.

Children left behind by suicide carry the persistent ache of a parent erased. They … Read more...

Help me offer support for someone suicidal?

how to hang yourself, how to hang myself, best place to hang myself

Trigger warning for vulnerable individuals.

If you or someone you know is suffering thoughts of suicide, here are some resources.

  • Suicide hot line: 1-800-273-8255

  • Suicide text line: 741-741

  • Veteran’s Services 1-800-273-8255, press 1

  • Veteran’s Text line send HELP to 838-255

Kate is 50 years old and found this blog from google, is currently suffering suicidal thoughts and reached out to me through my contact form. I was wondering if you could show her some emotionally naked support.

This is our email conversation that she agreed I could post here. Part of that is so you see how persistent, painful … Read more...