Category: Suicide

James River Out of the Darkness Walk

Virginia high school campus walks have raised over $40k for suicide prevention. James River has exceeded its goal of $5k! It’s great to see these walks pop up on campus, bringing awareness to a topic that has long been swept under the rug and not discussed.

The James River walk starts at 10am Saturday, May 19, 2017 and you can do walk up and register at the school. You can still donate online until June 30, 2017.

Andy, the famous Virginia suicide prevention mascot that raised $700 last year for his beloved master Charles at the annual Richmond walk, … Read more...

Two teens will tell their story of depression on Channel 12

 

See the video

Drew Wilder of Channel 12 asked me if I knew of two teens willing to talk on camera about depression and suicide a couple of months ago. I mentioned the request to these two at the “No Eagle Left Behind” assembly at Godwin High School in March, a club they are part of.

Both of them immediately said, “I want to talk!” I was shocked at how enthusiastic and willing they were. So I sent their numbers and their parent’s numbers to Drew since he would need permission. The parents were overwhelmingly supportive. Again, another surprise.… Read more...

The left turn

I’m sitting in traffic on June 4, 2015. It’s about 4:45pm or so.

I am on my way to a running event with my team, a digital marketing company for which I co-owned at the time. All my employees will be there. I have to show up. The weather is ugly and rainy.

I am wearing my company shirt we bought just for this event.

I want to bail but leaving will look like I bailed because of the weather. Having a child with mental health and now addiction issues makes me so unreliable. I told them earlier that day … Read more...

Blue Whale is a deadly social media game #bluewhale

I heard about this game a week ago from Jule, a 16-year-old girl from Germany who has written for this site. Jule who tells me about current trends warned me about this dangerous game that started in Russia and is spreading across Europe and now into Kenya and the US.

I might have dismissed this game myself wondering if this is fake news but I trust Jule to tell me about current trends.

Facts have definitely been all over the place

This “game” has supposedly been a contributing factor to the suicides of multiple* Russian schoolgirls. Deaths have been reported … Read more...

In the media

Thanks to your sharing and help, we’ve reached a lot of people! I get messages, notes, letters from so many who saw a post on your wall and got help for a friend, recognized signs of mental illness, suicide and addiction. Others have gotten the inspiration to speak out based on the same sharing.

Not for one second do I think I’m doing this alone. And for the first time in my life, I feel support–support that I so craved while advocating for my son before he died by suicide. Support that feels good, powerful and effective.

This is just … Read more...

Why I started this blog

Many years ago when I was around 12, I got a diary with a lock on it. And even though it had a lock on it, I feared that it would be broken into. Within a week my brother did just that. From then on, I didn’t write anything “real” in that diary. I was too afraid to expose my inner most thoughts.

Decades later, when I lost my son Charles to suicide, no one asked me about my son, as if I erased him from my family tree. Not only was I hurting, I was angry.

As a parent, … Read more...

Review of ’13 Reasons Why’ from a grieving mother #13RW

Let’s face it. Now that people are talking about suicide, we are not always going to be able to control the conversation. And in that case, we have to grab it as an opportunity to educate.

This Netflix series was created from a book and it’s designed for entertainment. It’s riveting and easy to see why teens are intrigued. But it’s also dark and potentially a trigger for teens at risk.

If they incorporated all of the suicide prevention recommendations, would it be something teens would watch? I don’t know. But how hard would it be to add a suicide … Read more...

Jule’s review on S-Town Podcast

Note from Anne Moss: Jule is a 16-year-old from Germany who contacted me a while back to post this #griefheart for her friend Christian who died by suicide. This is her third contribution to this site. 

By Jule

(Major spoilers for the S-Town podcast ahead)

I read the “13 Reasons Why” book in 2011 and so naturally I watched the 13RW show right after it came out, ignoring all the trigger warnings concerning people who have been suicidal and having a trauma connected to suicide (because I have both).

Luckily for me, it worked fine and did not trigger … Read more...

I refuse to bury my son’s memory

There are days that I realize, I’m “that” mother–the one whose child killed himself. I can’t slip out of my skin and be somewhere else or someone else, I have to face this head on.

The truth is, while I can’t avoid it, others can.

It’s how others react that is often interesting and I’ve decided to be sort of an observer of human nature and not be offended. This “scientific” approach towards witnessing reactions to death has helped tremendously.

People ask, “How many children do you have?” to which I give my standard answer. “One of my children is living … Read more...

News outlets sensationalize Aaron Hernandez’ death

There are so many things wrong about how this story was, and continues to be handled by the press.

All the major news outlets used the headline that they released in the story that does not follow suicide reporting guidelines.

I won’t link to any particular story as I refuse to give them the traffic they are seeking by sensationalizing this case. Ya’ll know how to use google.

Problem #1

The headline is sensationalized. A former super bowl player’s suicide would attract enough attention without that embellishment. It has far too much detail in the headline which is not … Read more...

What is suicidal thinking?

Suicidal thinking is a brain attack that causes an episode of emotional pain so great, people who suffer from the thoughts think that death is the only option. They think they are worthless and that your life would be better without them.

That moment comes on with extreme intensity and can last anywhere from a few minutes to several hours but a typical timeframe would be twenty minutes.

In that moment of unbearable pain, the sufferer’s brain betrays them and tells them the only way out is to kill themselves which, of course, is not the case. But remember, a major … Read more...

Heroin is a filthy rotten liar

Heroin told my son he was invincible and wouldn’t get addicted.

Heroin told Charles it was the answer to his pain, when in fact it made things worse.

Heroin told my son his problems were everyone else’s fault.

Heroin told him just one more hit and then he could stop, but it never let go.

Heroin told him he would feel first-hit euphoria all over again, even though he never did.

Heroin told him to lie, cheat and steal then convinced his brain that was OK when it wasn’t.

Heroin told him his loved ones abandoned him, when in fact it was the drug that made him abandon … Read more...

Make the memorial service for death of a child meaningful

This is not the service anyone wants to plan. But when you have to, it’s nice to have some ideas that you know meant something to a mom who has suffered the loss of a child. I’ve been asked this enough, it’s time I wrote a post about it.

You want to know how you can help? So here’s how

I was so overwhelmed by my son’s suicide, that I had to ask for help from my friends when it came to planning funeral details. I didn’t hesitate to accept help for this nor did I shy away from asking for … Read more...

Allie’s Opinion on ’13 Reasons Why’ #13RW

Allie

by Allie

From Anne Moss: Allie is a senior in high school from Chapel Hill, NC who has struggled with managing mental illness and suicidal thoughts. Here’s what she said about the show, ’13 Reasons Why’ on Netflix. She and her mother have given permission for it to be posted here. 

“At first I liked the show, I read the book a few times in middle school and I liked it then–when I was first really starting to struggle with mental illness.

As I began watching the show this week [April 9, 2017] I found myself starting to feel a lot darker … Read more...

What Richard said after his brother’s suicide

At our tour of Harry Potter Studios in England

The night Charles died, we had to call our loved ones and share the tragic news. The last one we called was Richard, our oldest son. We knew he stayed up later than both of our parents (Charles’ grandparents) whom we started calling at 9:30pm.

Prior to that, we just couldn’t even talk, walk straight or comprehend. We found out about 8pm and I had to tell his girlfriend first which was a heart-breaking, gut-wrenching call as yet another person felt the stab of that loss and the guilt that often follows a … Read more...