Category: #griefheart

These are the #griefheart pictures representing my grief journey

Daniel Kyre’s heart— #griefheart number 249

Daniel Kyre
Daniel Kyre’s heart

From Anne Moss: David Kyre, Daniel’s dad, sent me this picture of hamburgers and melted cheese in the shape of hearts– a #griefheart to honor his son who died by suicide. Daniel’s birthday is July 6.  An incredibly talented musician, Daniel was on his way to fame and fortune.

David Kyre: “I hadn’t planned on putting thick slices of cheese on these burgers because I bought the cheese as a snack for low carb diet to pinch and eat. My wife thought that’s why I got them so I broke them up and placed them on the patties. … Read more...

Hiking heart— #griefheart number 248

hiking heart
Hiking heart

I was hiking with friends, Bonnie and MaryJo, when we spotted this heart. Literally a heart in the woods that someone painted on the end of this log. This was the last place I would have expected to see a heart. Charles was walking with us.

My husband often goes to hike in the woods to find peace from his grief. I do the same with him or with friends. Being outdoors helps. It just reminds you that you are part of a larger grand scheme and allows you to get outside of your own head.

What is

… Read more...

Luminous heart— #griefheart number 247

Luminous heart

When I saw this at the Overnight Walk in Washington DC it was like it was made for this project. The luminaries are all about honoring the life and struggles of those who have died by suicide and they are made by those who do this 16 mile trek overnight through the city. This particular arrangement was displayed on the steps of the Lincoln Memorial.

There were thousands of bags and I did find the luminaries we decorated in Charles’ memory.  Guess where? Not in the heart but at the top on stage. Exactly where I expected to … Read more...

Dirty driveway heart— #griefheart number 246

Oil slick heart

My sister-in-law’s sister sent me this. It was taken in Florida at my in-law’s condo. That was where Charles went with his grandparents a few hours before going to detox as a result of opiate withdrawal. At that point, none of us knew he was addicted to heroin. So you can imagine the shock of taking him to the hospital and they don’t tell the grandparents what’s wrong with him.

My father-in-law basically yelled to the healthcare worker f–k HIPAA, you tell me what’s wrong with my grandson now! And they told him he needed to go … Read more...

Flock of love— #griefheart number 245

Flock of love

I look at the sky a lot.

The clouds, in particular, are soothing to me since Charles’ suicide. I’m always amazed at how much entertainment is up there.

These birds formed a heart in New Mexico and Katherine caught it with her camera. It made me think of that Hitchcock movie, “The Birds.”

I remember watching the end of that movie with Charles. He didn’t see the whole movie and I remember him asking me a million questions but I couldn’t remember it exactly. He couldn’t believe it because he remembered every scene and every line in a movie … Read more...

Giannini’s heart— #griefheart number 244

Giannini’s heart

Diane lost her son to suicide on March 29, 2017 and this #griefheart is in honor of Joshua’s struggle with addiction and depression, like my son Charles. At this writing, she is struggling with those initial stages of grief–fog, shock, and disbelief. I remember this stage. I was so confused and being able to follow more than two steps was a challenge.

Joshua Giannini left his mother some heartfelt goodbye videos she shared with us. Diane’s comment below.

“Wow…. went to the site where my son passed and found this rock. A broken heart – a part of … Read more...

Jerky heart— #griefheart number 243

Jerky heart

Charles loved beef jerky almost as much as he loved wings. Teriyaki being his favorite flavor.

Whenever I walk past a bag of beef jerky I think about him. I stand there, stuck in a stare at a snack bag. Funny, how such simple things jerk my heart strings and trigger random memories about my child that died by suicide.

What is the #griefheart project?

I explain my #griefheart project here.

See all #griefhearts so far on pinterest or on this blog by #griefheart category.

Grief writes me a love letter
… Read more...

Connected heart— #griefheart number 242

Connected heart

A new friend in the neighborhood had me and two other ladies for dinner tonight. She had sent me this heart previously, having seen it in Chickahominy which is in Hanover, Virginia. Three of the four of us at dinner lost a child to suicide. It’s always nice to be able to talk openly on the subject although we talked about a lot of other things, too.

Lots of laughter. Some tears. A lot of camaraderie. I had such a good time. Because even if you lose a child to suicide, you can laugh again. You can even … Read more...

Stalking heart— #griefheart number 241

Stalking heart

All week, those Mother’s Day ads, hearts, balloons, flowers, greeting cards have stalked me where ever I go. It’s hard not to see them as reminders of my chid that it no longer here.

The week was brutal. It’s only better now because I have my oldest with me now.

So remember friends of yours who’ve lost a child. Remember friends you know who’ve lost their mom. And remember mothers who have a child suffering from addiction, not in recovery.

I saved the last line for my mom who I am fortunate to still have. I love you!

What is the #griefheart project?

… Read more...

Poop heart— #griefheart number 240

Poop heart

People are truly seeing hearts everywhere! This one from Alex’ horse.

Charles would absolutely love this. He would think it was hilarious. So that’s why it’s here. And poop jokes? Good God boys start snickering about poop jokes at age 2. When do they get old? Never. Boys and men love their poop and fart jokes. As the sole female in my household, I was outnumbered in that regard.

I hope Charles is laughing in heaven at this one.

What is the #griefheart project?

I explain my #griefheart project here.

See all #griefhearts so far on pinterest … Read more...

Bonfire heart— #griefheart number 239

Bonfire heart

Charles loved having people over for a bonfire. And I loved it when we had all his friends over. I always felt better when he and all the kids were at my house then I could catch up with them, too.

One time he decided to bring the fire pit onto the deck. By the time, I came out to do my “friend check,” some of the deck boards had burned. We kept our eye on these parties, too. That’s what a child with impulse control issues can do in 5 minutes flat. Start a blazing fire in … Read more...

Cookie cutter heart— #griefheart number 238

Cookie cutter heart

Charles was the farthest thing from “cookie cutter” and he hated the phrase “politically correct.”  He could be pretty out there in terms of his point of view. He was a crazy idealist who had a perfect solution on how to fix social injustice. It was part of his charm.

I loved watching him debate and pace around the room while he made his argument. It was like he could make you believe just about anything no matter how illogical or impractical it was.

What is the #griefheart project?

I explain my #griefheart project here.

See all #… Read more...

Corsage heart — #griefheart number 237

Corsage heart

As a parent of a child who suffered from depression and drug abuse, I grieved for the loss of that high school experience other parents’ had. The experience his brother got but he was robbed of.

Charles’ life-threatening behavior had escalated right before his junior prom and that’s about the time we had him kidnapped out of his bed and taken to a wilderness program. At this point, Charles was not addicted to anything nor was he diagnosed with a mental illness. But we knew something was seriously wrong and he was experimenting with very dangerous substances. He was taking some big … Read more...

Lobster heart— #griefheart number 236

Lobster heart

Charles loved lobster and one of his favorite restaurants was Red Lobster. It wasn’t until he was a teenager that he came to appreciate it. Both of us were a little freaked out that we’d see the live crustaceans at the entrance that would soon be someone’s dinner.

He didn’t need the salad or vegetables. He was a purist you know, not wanting to confuse his stomach with plant-based foods. The shock to his system would have been too much!

I remember the battles we had as a family trying to find a place the whole family wanted to … Read more...

Heart of a winner— #griefheart number 235

Heart of a winner

One of the many joys of my advocacy work is connecting with the teens. This is Alex. She is a warrior for the cause of youth mental health and suicide prevention. And she is the Beacon Tree Foundation Jr. Ambassador of Hope Award winner for 2017.

What is the #griefheart project?

I explain my #griefheart project here.

See all #griefhearts so far on pinterest or on this blog by #griefheart category.

Allie’s Opinion on ’13 Reasons Why’ #13RW
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