Are we normal people any more?

I am often out somewhere, going to the grocery or drug store, doing normal people things but feeling I’m not normal any more.

Today, we were driving back from visiting my parents in North Carolina and I watched parents in Chick-fil-A with their kids. I remember when we did those things with our own kids. Stopped to eat on the way to vacation somewhere. We asked if they needed to use the bathroom, if they’d washed their hands, what did they want to eat.

I look at some of the t-shirts the parents are wearing emblazoned with home-made logos in … Read more...

Joy and sadness

Such joy to visit my oldest son Richard living in LA.

Sadness because my youngest son, Charles, was not with us.

Joy to see Richard handling real life and maturing.

Sadness that he’s so far away from us.

Joy to see my oldest follow a dream he’s had since 8th grade.

Sadness that my youngest didn’t get to do the same.

Joy in the fact that Richard has a solid job at a good company (Tom Hanks studio, Hertzog)

Sadness that I have to leave and go home.

It’s hard to get used to the roller coaster of emotions … Read more...

Corsage heart — #griefheart number 237

Corsage heart

As a parent of a child who suffered from depression and drug abuse, I grieved for the loss of that high school experience other parents’ had. The experience his brother got but he was robbed of.

Charles’ life-threatening behavior had escalated right before his junior prom and that’s about the time we had him kidnapped out of his bed and taken to a wilderness program. At this point, Charles was not addicted to anything nor was he diagnosed with a mental illness. But we knew something was seriously wrong and he was experimenting with very dangerous substances. He was taking some big … Read more...