Category: Suicide

The cop I thought I hated

by Sarah Gaer

I like to say friends are the family we choose. 

For many reasons, my chosen family as a young person was often the kids who didn’t belong anywhere else. Kids bond through shared traits and I felt like a social outcast and so I connected with the other kids who also felt the same.

Some of them came from abusive homes, some of them had learning disabilities, some of them had mental health challenges and some had all of the above. Sadly, because I fit in with the group that felt they fit in nowhere, I lost … Read more...

Suicide, Stigma, & the African American Community

By Victor Armstrong, VP Behavioral Health of Atrium Health

Victor Armstrong TW: @1of2vics

According to an article published in verywell health (1), Black men in the United States suffer worse health than any other racial group in America and, as a group, have the lowest life expectancy and the highest death rate compared to both men and women of other racial and ethnic groups.

Among the leading statistics of concern are:

  • 44% of black men are considered overweight
  • 24% are obese
  • 40% of black men die prematurely from cardiovascular disease as compared to 21% of white men
  • Black men
… Read more...

July is minority mental health month

Minority mental health month is inclusive of ethnic groups as well as other marginalized populations such as the LGBTQ community. While it’s hard for any group of people to find good mental health care, it’s especially difficult for minority populations.

Lack of acceptance, prejudice or denial of mental illness in these communities can increase the risk of suicide. For this post, I’m focusing on suicide rates and attempts by minority populations. These are sobering statistics.

… Read more...

Our Son’s Preventable Suicide

by Pat Sterling

Strong emotional content and suicide method referenced. If you are in crisis, text “help” to 741-741 or call 988

On March 22, 2018 our 38-year-old son, Brian, took his own life.

My husband and I believe very strongly that Brian’s suicide could have been prevented if the first group of medical responders and sheriff officers who we called had acted appropriately.

What follows is a reconstruction of events to the best of our recollection and we question why officers who responded to our 911 call did not exercise their authority to use an ECO (Ref: Emergency Custody … Read more...

Upcoming Presentation on Preventure

We Got the Grant—An Overview of a Substance Abuse Prevention Program Study

chesterfield chamber

I’m excited to be presenting on this amazing program.

There are four traits that Put Kids at Risk of Substance Misuse and in January 2019, VCU Institute of Drug & Alcohol Studies with Beacon Tree Foundation, won the VCU CCTR Endowment Fund to implement Preventure, a personality targeted life skills training program that has been shown to reduce drug and alcohol use in schools by up to 80%.

The pilot study, the first in the US, will include four Virginia schools, two of which are in … Read more...

“There’s nothing you could have done”

Saying that there is nothing we could have done is different than, “You all did so much.” There is something we could have done had we known. Except this is not some mistake a little white-out can remedy. (White-out is the stuff we used to use to correct mistakes on a typed piece of paper.)

That’s what stalks most of us after a suicide. We do know it’s preventable and we ache over that because we can’t turn back time. Some leave no clues, some leave subtle ones and still others, like Charles, leave signs that are flashing neon lights… Read more...

As much as I want you to get well, I love you even if you don’t

killed himself

This is what I wish I had said to Charles.

I was so stunned when I found out he was addicted to heroin. And while I know I felt that way, I didn’t express it just like that. I needed to. Our loved ones who suffer addiction need to hear it.

What kept Charles from ending his life before were thoughts of his family.

He pinned up pictures of us wherever he went including that awful trap house place where he was staying in the end to remind him that he had a family who cared. They were reminders during … Read more...

Speaking at Virginia Center for Addiction Medicine Family Program

Families, community members, professionals that are educated about addiction have the best outcomes. It’s as simple as that. I hope to see you at this VCAM event.

DESCRIPTION

Addiction: It’s not Personal- They behave the way they do because they are not well

Takeaways:

  • It’s not your fault
  • Perpetuation of shame and how it figures into recovery
  • The importance of connection
  • Signs of suicide and what to do
  • The importance of finding support
  • It’s not just their recovery, it’s ours, too

My time slot: 12:30-1:30pm
Audience: Families who have a loved one with SUD, community members and professionals.

… Read more...

What to say to a friend who tells you they want to suicide

What Do You Say Concept

First, tell your friend you are honored they trust you enough to tell you. And the number one most important thing you can do is listen with empathy.

So what does that mean? Listening with empathy means you listen without passing judgement or offering advice. You can’t “fix” this but you can prevent a suicide simply by sitting and listening to someone.

So what do you say exactly?

When they say they want to suicide, you can say. “Tell me more, I’m listening.” If you can’t remember anything else on this post, you can remember … Read more...

My teen just lost a friend to suicide. How can I help my child?

Digital StillCamera

Unresolved loss is an underlying reason for a lot of substance misuse/addiction as well as a contributing factor for suicide and suicide attempts.

We think of children as resilient but that doesn’t mean they “get over it.” Grief is not something that just goes away, you simply learn to live with it. If you love someone, it hurts to lose them. Unresolved loss is the result of trying to avoid the grief or going silent on the subject altogether.

I couldn’t avoid the pain of losing Charles when he died by suicide And no other hurt I ever … Read more...

Where can you help with this blog or promoting the book?

October 1, 2019 is the publish date for the book. And since you guys have been asking, I made a quick list of how you can help me with the blog and the book and de-stigmatize mental illness, addiction, suicide and grief. Pick one or more than one. It’s up to you. Whatever you do helps.

Encourage people to join the subscriber tribe list to win an advance copy of the book, a post publish copy of the book, or just because you think it could help them or the cause. You can share this page.

If you’ve not … Read more...

Article in Richmond Free Press

Anne Moss Rogers wants to foster a “culture of connection” to help prevent suicide. Being selected as the 2019 recipient of the YWCA’s Pat Asch Fellowship for Social Justice will help her achieve that goal……..

article in richmond free press
How to write a suicide note
… Read more...

A Toastmasters story to warm your heart

A story shared by W Joseph Stegner

A snippet of Joseph’s poem. Link to the entire poem at the bottom of the post.

“Anne Moss Nimocks Rogers, I had occasion to share copies of your blog post, which includes “Be Like a Phoenix,” tonight, at San Leandro Toastmasters. A fellow artist within the club reached out on Facebook, expressing her need and request for help, with all the classic cues to the proximity of the edge she was on the verge of surrendering to.

Thanks to a friend and fellow Toastmaster, Stephen Dolgin, he saw the post … Read more...

Tara offers a testimonial and a personal story of her own

When I tell my story, others in the audience are inspired to tell theirs. And that’s the conversation and connection I want to happen.

You never know who in the audience is touched by mental illness, substance misuse or both. Most everyone has someone in their life effected by either one.

And when I speak, oftentimes people in the audience tell us stories they’ve never told anyone. Tara has actually tried to talk about her best friend with others. But conversation about the friend she wants to remember is often met with disdain and judgement because we don’t understand suicide. … Read more...