It’s not just their recovery. It’s yours, too

This is our new war. This addiction epidemic.

Nothing makes you feel so helpless– watching your loved one self destruct. You want to fix it.  But you can’t. And you may have finally realized that.

You can’t make them choose recovery. No matter how much you want it. They have to want it.

And if they do choose it. You can’t do it for them.

There are things you can do.

One is get educated on addiction. Find out as much as you can. Learn, learn, learn. Go to an education group, a support group.

It’s not just the addicted that need to shift.

It’s not just “their” problem. It’s our problem.

We need to shift. Families. The community. Everyone.

You need to go into recovery, too.

We need to learn what to do. We need to learn to let go. We need to learn to live with it without imploding or projecting. We need to learn how to react and how to speak to our loved one who suffers. We need to figure out how to hold onto hope. Set boundaries. Be prepared to act when they say they need help, no matter how inconvenient.

And finally, we need to love them and let them know we still do love them. Somehow. Even when they are using.

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Published by

Anne Moss Rogers

I am the mother of two boys and the owner of emotionally naked, a site that reached a quarter million people in its first 18 months. I am a writer and professional public speaker on the topics of suicide, addiction, mental illness, and grief and my book, Diary of a Broken Mind, will be published in the fall. I lost my youngest son, Charles, 20, to suicide June 5, 2015. As talented and funny as Charles was, letting other people know they matter was his greatest gift. And now the legacy I try and carry forward in my son's memory. Professional Speaker Website

4 thoughts on “It’s not just their recovery. It’s yours, too”

  1. As a Mom of someone with addiction, your words ring true. I now focus my energy on my own recovery, try to lead by example and pray that he is willing to find lasting recovery, finally.

    1. I hope he finds recovery too. I am glad you have adopted the mindset so you can have a life. I had relapses but once I adopted the mindset, I learned how to get back on my own program of parent recovery

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