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Will my son go to hell because he killed himself?

Hell no.

Whether it’s a son, daughter, sister, brother, mother, father, girlfriend, boyfriend, husband or wife, God isn’t out there to punish you or your loved one for a cause of death even if it’s a suicide.

That goes for those of you who suffer from thoughts of suicide, too. Sometimes “praying on it” isn’t enough and you need help and compassion. I hope you don’t deny yourself the help you need because a group has shamed you out of it.

Someone with a heart condition isn’t told to “pray on it.”

Parishioners and congregations do shun families who’ve lost a loved one to suicide and those who’ve attempted suicide. They may be judgmental at a time when they should be supportive. And if that’s the case, you need a new place of worship.

Faith isn’t about passing judgment or pious perfection. It’s about compassion and caring for others, being there for others during difficult times, especially in grief and loss. And those who’ve suffered a loss by suicide might need more of that.

There are many places of worship that will support those who have lost a loved one to suicide, those who suffer thoughts of suicide or have a mental illness. You deserve that.

God or whomever you worship doesn’t discriminate against or ostracize you or bar your loved one from heaven because they suffered from the brain pain of a suicidal crisis. Suicide is not a crime, it’s a public health issue. Period.

Published by

Anne Moss Rogers

I am an emotionally naked mental health speaker, and author of the Book, Diary of a Broken Mind and co-author with Kim O'Brien PhD, LICSW of Emotionally Naked: A Teacher's Guide to Preventing Suicide and Recognizing Students at Risk. I raised two boys, Richard and Charles, and lost my younger son, Charles to addiction and suicide on June 5, 2015. I help people foster a culture of connection to prevent suicide, reduce substance misuse and find life after loss. My motivational mental health keynotes, training and workshop topics include suicide prevention, addiction, mental illness, anxiety, coping strategies/resilience, and grief. As talented and funny as Charles was, letting other people know they matter was his greatest gift. And now the legacy I try and carry forward in my son's memory. Mental Health Speakers Website. Trained in ASIST and trainer for the evidence-based 4-hour training for everyone called safeTALK.

6 thoughts on “Will my son go to hell because he killed himself?”

  1. I soooo agree with you, Anne Moss. How could a member of y(our) tribe be in Hell? His legacy lives on through your work to save the lives of others; that’s something only an Angel can do.

    Love,
    Hayden

  2. He was living his own “Hell”. Now? His energy surrounds you 24/7, because energy never dies. It lives on through other lives, living things, emotions, nature, and beyond infinity.
    Personally, I do not believe in an afterlife Heaven OR Hell. Charles had so much energy and the Heroin Hell took him away, but NOT his energy. I was, once at a funeral, and ended up talking to the Catholic Priest who officiated. I asked him about suicide and whether or not it was still considered a “crime” in the eyes of the law. (I had recently been affected by a loved one who took his own life). He told me that in the 80’s , the laws of the Catholic Church changed (not surprised by that answer at all). It was no longer considered a crime. It was forgiven. St. Peter (I think that is who he said) opened up the gates of Heaven for all of those who had died by suicide. My mouth hung opened. So I said to him…….. “So, for example, all of those people who died by suicide during the depression (with families who THOUGHT they were doomed to Hell , and are now gone themselves, ) are now in Heaven?” He gave me a smirk, and walked away from my table. I cannot imagine dying your own death knowing(or at least THINKING) that your loved one who died by suicide will not be in Heaven (if you believe in that). So, the laws have changed. The living Hell that many of these people are in is enough to release their continuous energy into the atmosphere to live eternally. I am quite sure that, although Charles’ body is no longer alive, the ridiculous amount of energy that he had is free, happy, colliding/collaborating with others and working on making this world and other worlds a better place. You are living proof that he is NOT in Hell. Keep doing what you are doing, because that energy comes from somewhere!!!

    1. Thank you for commenting here Shawn. I believe as you do and this story is good. I believe the article will be found through google and I want families to get support and if it’s not at their church I hope they go elsewhere

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