He promised not to attempt suicide again

This is an impossible and un-keepable promise.

I remember talking to a friend of Charles’ who had attempted suicide and saying something like this. When we say, “Don’t do that again,” we think it lets the other person know how much we care.

We want them to guarantee they won’t hurt or scare us again and we can’t imagine life without them and want them to know that. We hope we are communicating we’d miss them when they are gone. But I think the person to whom I said it felt shamed at a point when she already felt that … Read more...

Hearing the word selfish to describe suicide is a trigger

by Jon Farrow

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Since the news of Chester Bennington’s death I have heard and read the term selfish being thrown around to describe his death. Losing the battle to mental illness is anything but selfish. Hearing the word selfish to describe someone’s death is a trigger for many– myself included.

For two weeks after losing my Father to suicide, I locked myself away from the world. I shut my blinds and allowed the darkness to consume me. I had struggled for so long that I just wanted the pain to end. In that time period I thought about losing my … Read more...

Suicide is not an act of selfishness

definition of suicide

Thinking it’s an act of selfishness is a lack of understanding of what suicide is.

Even before Charles died by suicide, I did not subscribe to the “selfish” notion. I remember Charles walking into my office and telling me that a friend’s dad had died by suicide. He said he thought it was selfish.

Then he asked what I thought.

Did he think it was selfish? Or was testing me to see what I thought. I don’t know that I will ever know for sure. My gut tells me he wanted to know whether I thought suicide meant someone was … Read more...