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What is it like to suffer from addiction?

by Missy S.

From Anne Moss: Missy is a friend from way back. She had surgery and became unwittingly addicted to the pain medication prescribed. There were many years of shame and humiliation and I recall how terrible I felt for her–especially after Charles’ death. I knew her family was suffering and the added shame and gossip made it that much harder. While I didn’t suffer addiction, Charles did, and I felt that judgement by association. She is in recovery. Thanks to the love of her family, who never abandoned her. 

For so many years addiction and depression has been … Read more...

Mental illness and addiction need to be treated together

dual diagnosis

So many times, I’d take Charles somewhere for treatment and they’d draw a line in the sand between mental illness and drug abuse/addiction. Everything seemed to be treated separately although they most always seem to happen together.

Substance use disorder is listed in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-III) as a mental illness. Mental and emotional symptoms of alcoholism exist long before the grave physical complications of the disease appear.

In a study of 133 of those with substance use disorder, 93% met the criteria for one or more psychiatric disorders other than substance abuse. Depressions … Read more...

You relapsed

You feel shame and you’re hiding it from your family because you know they will be hurt. They are tired of it. You are tired of it.

In all honesty, you can’t figure out how you got back to this place. All you know is that you have to feed that monster called addiction. Now. It just pulls you back into that same ugly pattern. Lying to you over and over and over again, making you do things the real you would never do.

So familiar. So miserable.

You don’t want to be in this place at all. You think about reaching Read more...

Drug addiction is like a diet. Sort of

I know recovery from addiction is far more difficult with a much higher price tag than a diet. But there are similarities from my point of view.

Think about it. You go on a diet and you cut things out that you identify as the culprits to being overweight.

You might deny yourself chocolate, for example.

But at some point, your resolve starts to wear away and you crave chocolate. It’s ALL you can think about. You dream chocolate.

After several weeks of denying yourself this treat, you have a little

A week later, you lose it, break down and binge on chocolate.… Read more...

Looking at the other side of addiction

I sit in this warm room surrounded by the bravest, most passionate people I have ever seen. I am now a familiar face and certain gentlemen greet me and ask me questions which I welcome.

Just a short time ago the man speaking had been sleeping under a bridge. Hard to imagine. He is articulate and emotional. This guy could be a motivational speaker.

He’s about 45 and moved to tears he’s so thankful to be alive.

He expresses how grateful he is to the other brothers in the room, fellow addicts, for taking him in once he made that step to find recovery. I can … Read more...