broken plates

I have dreamt of renting a racquetball court, putting on safety glasses and having a big stack of dishes. My friend Tamara, me, Laurie, Scott, Reid, Roz, Henry, Jenny, Pat, Cathy, Shirley, Joanna and many of you regulars here would be lined up, ready to take a turn. It would be fundraiser and the video would go viral.

The game is we put on our safety glasses, get behind a wall and smash and slam those damn dishes on the far wall until we are all exhausted. Laughing and crying while we shatter stuff. I would throw them like frisbees.

I can’t tell you how …

Sweet potato heart — #griefheart number 221

This one is so perfect for Charles. If there was a child that was sweet, it was him. And it has a flaw. Not a terrible flaw but a flaw nonetheless.

I think Charles had a hard time accepting his flaws could be gifts. He only saw depression as terrible when in fact I think those that suffer from depression see things others cannot. I wish he could have seen it.

What is the #griefheart project?

I explain my #griefheart project here.

See all #griefhearts so far on pinterest or on this blog by#griefheart category.

Be part


Gifted heart— #griefheart number 220

gifted heart

Grief is a gift because it represents the love I still feel for my son, Charles who died by suicide. My friend Kay sent this to me. She carries a similar one in her handbag to remind her of her mom who died a few years ago.

I have to tell you that before I started this project, I was not a fan of hearts. Now I see them everywhere. And I have you guys seeing them everywhere. Thank you for making grief OK.

What is the #griefheart project?

I explain my #griefheart project here.

See all #griefhearts so …

The turning point. When did things start to go wrong?

charles middle school

Adolescence is when things with Charles started falling apart–around 2010. I was scrambling around trying to help him keep it all together. I started to see signs that were alarming but I couldn’t get a handle on it.

In 5th grade and middle school, Charles’ teachers kept telling me that he was unprepared for class and was often jumpy and nervous when he realized everyone had their materials out but him. It was all still manageable enough at this age.

He did have ADHD. And a sleep disorder. But I felt like I didn’t have the whole picture. I researched … Read more...



You guys shared the article ‘Can addiction be prevented?‘ so much, Richmond Family Magazine reported back that their visitation had increased by FIVE HUNDRED PERCENT that month. You rock! Your hyper-sharing was certainly appreciated.

Because you shared so much, it got ranked on Google and we received messages from all over about Preventure, the new solution to adolescent drug and alcohol prevention for which we had been soliciting letters of support. I heard from Ohio, Arizona, Maryland and the Caribbean and I had a call with another mental health advocate and the attorney general’s office in Ohio. … Read more...

Love remains— #griefheart number 219

love remains

Despite the fact Charles has left this earth, my love for him remains. Sometimes it’s hard to know where to put it and it makes me ache.

This photo a gift from my friend Dani. She spotted 25 feet away while walking in the woods.

What is the #griefheart project?

I explain my #griefheart project here.

See all #griefhearts so far on pinterest or on this blog by#griefheart category.

Be part of the village. Subscribe to this blog

Family Matters – a rap by Charles Aubrey Rogers


Cosby High School is the first to pilot the #umatterchallenge!


Check out the video the teens did! Thanks to Alex Chaffee, teen leader and member of the Swift Creek YMCA Leader’s Club for her help in leading the charge on this social media mental illness acceptance and suicide prevention program! And to all the students who stood up against the stigma of mental illness.

I doubt I could have gotten a team of adults to do this video. So who’s gonna erase stigma? High school students like these guys!

If you want to bring this simple, 2-week program to your school, contact me. This program is through Beacon Read more...

Charles wanted to live

The hardest part of living with Charles’ suicide is knowing he didn’t want to die. The truth is, that most who attempt or complete a suicide don’t want to kill themselves. They simply want to end their relentless emotional pain.

In piecing together that final day, I know my son wanted to live and wanted help. He didn’t ask for it directly but he certainly sent off flares that sailed right over our heads because suicide was not on our radar.

Emotionally, our own brains were frozen on what to do

Charles hinted at suicide in texts to me like … Read more...

Organ donor heart— #griefheart number 219

One of the mom’s who is part of the village here, sent me this. This was given to her family by Midwest Transplant. Her son’s organs gave life to so many others. A blessing in the loss.

What is the #griefheart project?

I explain my #griefheart project here.

See all #griefhearts so far on pinterest or on this blog by#griefheart category.

Be part of the village. Subscribe to this blog

Not my child


Dear China, Brazil, Spain + more, don’t do the opiates!

You are being deceived by greedy American billionaires. Purdue Pharmaceutical, or Mundipharma as it’s known in many countries outside the United States, does not have your best interest at heart.

Drug companies and advocates for drugs such as OxyContin, Fentanyl and Vicodin, all opiates, spent more than $880 million on lobbying and political contributions in the United States over the past decade. That’s compared to $4 million by groups advocating opioid limits.

They could give a rat’s ass about your pain. All they care about is selling expensive drugs for a profit. Because this drug has created such an epidemic … Read more...