Verse for the Lonely – by Charles Aubrey Rogers

Lonely flower from Gene Nimocks
Lonely flower from Gene Nimocks

All by myself feeling’ lonely as hell
Like I fell in a well, no one hears me yell
Someone get me out of this pit
someone get me out of this shit
Sorry drippin’ down my pen
Bleeding out when I spit

This is a verse for the lonely
When you’re hurt mission’ homies
Poppin’ perks cause read more

How many lives can you save?

sunflower3
Lauren wanted her favorite flower in the post. This one is from the camera of Gene Nimocks, my brother, owner of Genescaping

When you read this, how can you not share it? Lauren is in her early 20s. So few her age talk openly about depression or suicide.  Talking and speaking out does work.

After Lauren sent it to me and then her parents, she asked me to post it here so you could see it and share it so that it would read more

What do those suicide notes look like?

Not everyone leaves a last letter.

But we mothers have found things tucked away and balled up in the trash. Maybe not an official suicide note, but they do reflect what the sufferer is feeling in their darkest hour.

Usually, they are not thinking of you. They are thinking you’d be better off without read more

Prickly Heart – #griefheart number 41

#griefheart
Prickly Heart

This is an original photo from a friend of mine. Obviously I don’t have desert as a yard.

But it does represent how my heart feels some days. Today especially. It just feels like a bunch sharp things are stuck in your heart. And it hurts.

What is the #griefheart project?

I explain my #griefheart project here.

See all # read more

Lyrical Heart -#griefheart number 40

Word heart
Lyrical heart

Charles had a way with words. From stories he wrote to songs he rapped, he was something else with a pen. This was his way of coping as it is mine.

He would take these magnet words and make the funniest sentences that only Charles could think of. He was master of funny. Such a creative genius.

What is the #griefheart project?

I explain read more

This is what I live for. It doesn’t get better than this

It’s letters like these that make my life worth living since Charles’ suicide. Warning. It will make you cry. A good cry. It is so thoughtful and well written. If the author is out there, thank you. This truly defines my purpose. I have removed read more

Street Heart – #griefheart number 39

Street Heart
Street Heart

We went to the Westover Hills neighborhood picnic and I’m watching the kids play. I turn slightly to the left and there it was, staring me in the face in a big clearing calling my name.

I had been remembering how much Charles loved to play. Loved chalk, the bouncy thing, the balloons, the read more

Crying Heart – #griefheart number 38

#griefheart
Crying Heart

The shower is the best place to cry. The good news is that I don’t cry everyday in the shower like I once did.

Sometimes I just have nice memories in the shower. But when I really want to let loose, I do it here most of the time. It might hurt like crazy but I let it all hang out and it feels read more

The final 48 hours

Charles, who suffered from anxiety and depression and ultimately addiction had been from detox to rehab to a sober house. After rehab he looked great. I call this “Saturday Charles.” He then went to the sober house but relapsed the next morning by walking downtown and buying heroin. read more