So the grief is like a tidal wave. When it hits, it hits hard. It can last a day or about a day and a half. Or sometimes shorter. But over the holidays the periods have stretched back out. They had gotten shorter and I know they will again. It maybe my journey but I’m not always the captain of it.
After a big hit of grief, you can have a “grief hangover” where you just feel sort of lethargic and shell shocked but relieved that the worst of it is over. Then you have to kick your own butt … Read more...
Feeling heavy of heart
Thankful to have spent a lot of time with Charles so I have a lot of memories. Thankful for friends who have reached out and supported me
Understanding that he suffered from an illness and it was not a lifestyle choice
Forging ahead with my promise not to be silent about suicide and mental health at Beacon Tree Foundation
And today, acknowledging the loss of others’ loved ones and that the holidays are also rough for them. My heart goes out to Amiya Moses‘ family today. She was only 12 … Read more...
Absolutely epic grief relapse this week. But today I forced myself on a long run to reset myself and today was better. Not perfect but not as dark. Talked to someone in recovery whose brother died by suicide. That helped. All of you out there helped. Your outreach is what I need. I am so blessed to have such caring friends. Thank you.… Read more...
Today is one of those days when it hurts so so so bad. I miss my boy so much. It is so hard to have cared for a child so intensely only to have him vanish and no longer be in your life at all. It is so surreal, so unbelievable.… Read more...
There are actually good things about grief. Believe it or not. You realize along life’s path, you can only control one person, yourself. And in grief, you realize you can’t always do that. You have to let the journey lead you and there are times you simply can’t fix yourself but you can guide yourself.
In this journey that absolutely no one wants to be on, you simply see more things than you saw before, let things go that are not important and reach out and touch people you would have never thought to connect with. You also learn other … Read more...
I know so many don’t know what to say to those who’ve suffered a loss, particularly that of a child and in the case of suicide.
Unfortunately, I can check both those boxes.
Suggestions on what to say
I made a pact to welcome any and all comments and never pass judgement on what someone has asked or said because it takes guts to speak up. After so many years of suffering in silence since he had such stigmatized illnesses, it’s a relief to let it out.
Figuring out what someone else in the same shoes wants is tough.
If … Read more...
A painful day. Meetings provided some distraction.
I was at the Comcast office today and I asked the CSR what his tattoo represented. He said it was for his mom who died when he was 15. He was about 28-30.
I asked him flat out if she had been a heroin addict and died from that disease. And he said yes. How did I know to ask? How did I just know that sun tattoo represented a mother who died of addiction? How could I have been so bold to ask that of a perfect stranger? I don’t know. I … Read more...
This was originally posted on the blog of the business I owned for 7 years.
Anne Moss Rogers’ son, Charles, 20, died by suicide June 5, 2015.
Charles was a creative genius who was articulate, intelligent, funny and loved to rap. He was currently in the process of producing a new album when he died by suicide.
While he lit up every room he ever entered, he struggled with anxiety and depression, addiction, ADHD and a sleep disorder. A deep, soulful and sensitive young man, Charles loved and treasured family and loved dogs, funky socks, drama and writing. But most … Read more...