My relationship with Charles after his death has continued and evolved. The idea that I’d have a relationship with someone who is dead makes me sound like I’m in need of a good therapist or that I am unable to accept his death.
Grief is something that lives along side me now. Talking to the air, consulting my beloved dead for advice, or laughing about something I know he’d find funny is part of that new relationship, if you could call it that. As my grief has changed and softened, so has the relationship.
I have not read tarot cards, consulted an 8 ball, or used an ouija board to communicate with my beloved dead but even if I did and it helped me cope, there would no grief shame. As long as these rituals didn’t take over my life, there would be no harm in them.
I don’t have a child I can hug or hold or watch graduate or get married. But there I times I feel his presence even if that merely exists in my own heart and head.