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Not emotionally ready for it

So I was called for jury duty. Again. They apparently randomly choose prospective jurors. I’ve lived in the city three years and have been called twice to serve although I have not officially been on a jury yet. None of my neighbors have been asked once. Random my @$$.

I don’t know that I can say much about the case I was polled for even though I was not chosen. When they asked me the question if I believed a police officer might not tell the truth, it took me back to the time when a rookie police officer did lie.

He said Charles took a swing at him. But he was handcuffed the whole time which was their process the moment they got a teen or young adult out of the car. When the backup cops arrived, he was still handcuffed, pants unzipped from the “search” the policeman did. And when they offered a plea deal, the “assault” charge was dropped with no mention. I won’t go into detail because I’ve written about this.

I know from Charles’ Facebook messages it was a contributing factor for his suicide. So after three years, I’m still angry about it. They asked me if I thought a policeman would lie and I had to be honest because in our experience there was lying, stalking, and sexual assault by a representative of the law. Add to that taunting, torture and then denial. It was a horrible experience.

I had to tell the abbreviated story to the DA, commonwealth attorney and the judge in a hallway in the court, my face red and my cheeks hosting familiar tears as my mouth went dry.

There are some really great police officers out there. I respect what they do but I’m not emotionally ready to sit on a jury where I have to decide a case between the two.

Published by

Anne Moss Rogers

I am an emotionally naked mental health speaker, and author of the Book, Diary of a Broken Mind and co-author with Kim O'Brien PhD, LICSW of Emotionally Naked: A Teacher's Guide to Preventing Suicide and Recognizing Students at Risk. I raised two boys, Richard and Charles, and lost my younger son, Charles to addiction and suicide on June 5, 2015. I help people foster a culture of connection to prevent suicide, reduce substance misuse and find life after loss. My motivational mental health keynotes, training and workshop topics include suicide prevention, addiction, mental illness, anxiety, coping strategies/resilience, and grief. As talented and funny as Charles was, letting other people know they matter was his greatest gift. And now the legacy I try and carry forward in my son's memory. Mental Health Speakers Website. Trained in ASIST and trainer for the evidence-based 4-hour training for everyone called safeTALK.

2 thoughts on “Not emotionally ready for it”

  1. Anne Moss, I’m sorry this was so traumatic, but I hope and believe that hallway conversation with the DA, judge and prosecutor will have an impact on them. My hope is that they truly *see* that what they do reaches many layers deep. Perhaps they will find this blog!!! 😊❤️

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