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Not emotionally ready for it

So I was called for jury duty. Again. They apparently randomly choose prospective jurors. I’ve lived in the city three years and have been called twice to serve although I have not officially been on a jury yet. None of my neighbors have been asked once. Random my @$$.

I don’t know that I can say much about the case I was polled for even though I was not chosen. When they asked me the question if I believed a police officer might not tell the truth, it took me back to the time when a rookie police officer did lie.

He said Charles took a swing at him. But he was handcuffed the whole time which was their process the moment they got a teen or young adult out of the car. When the backup cops arrived, he was still handcuffed, pants unzipped from the “search” the policeman did. And when they offered a plea deal, the “assault” charge was dropped with no mention. I won’t go into detail because I’ve written about this.

I know from Charles’ Facebook messages it was a contributing factor for his suicide. So after three years, I’m still angry about it. They asked me if I thought a policeman would lie and I had to be honest because in our experience there was lying, stalking, and sexual assault by a representative of the law. Add to that taunting, torture and then denial. It was a horrible experience.

I had to tell the abbreviated story to the DA, commonwealth attorney and the judge in a hallway in the court, my face red and my cheeks hosting familiar tears as my mouth went dry.

There are some really great police officers out there. I respect what they do but I’m not emotionally ready to sit on a jury where I have to decide a case between the two.

Published by

Anne Moss Rogers

I am an emotionally naked TEDx speaker, and author of the Book, Diary of a Broken Mind and co-author with Kim O'Brien PhD, LICSW of Emotionally Naked: A Teacher's Guide to Preventing Suicide and Recognizing Students at Risk. I raised two boys, Richard and Charles, and lost my younger son, Charles to substance use disorder and suicide on June 5, 2015. I help people foster a culture of connection to prevent suicide, reduce substance misuse and find life after loss. My motivational, training and workshop topics include suicide prevention, addiction, mental illness, coping strategies/resilience, and grief. As talented and funny as Charles was, letting other people know they matter was his greatest gift. And now the legacy I try and carry forward in my son's memory. Professional Speaker Website. Trained in ASIST and trainer for the evidence-based 4-hour training for everyone called safeTALK.

2 thoughts on “Not emotionally ready for it”

  1. Anne Moss, I’m sorry this was so traumatic, but I hope and believe that hallway conversation with the DA, judge and prosecutor will have an impact on them. My hope is that they truly *see* that what they do reaches many layers deep. Perhaps they will find this blog!!! 😊❤️

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