Recommended Grief Books for loss by suicide, loss of a child, general grieving books

★After Suicide Loss: Coping with Your Grief, 2nd Edition by Jack Jordan Ph.D

I read this one. At first, I was not able to read a book for more than a few pages because the lines would blur and I struggled to concentrate that first year after Charles’ suicide. I wasn’t able to read any book cover to cover until a year and a half later. It was an easy read and had examples of people who had lost a sibling, a child, a husband and what it was like for them as well as practical advice for survivors of suicide loss. This includes a chapter on helping children cope with a suicide loss. Readers have described this book as a practical guide for coping with suicide, from the first few days through the first year and beyond.

★Diary of a Broken Mind. A Mother’s Story, a Son’s Suicide, and the Haunting Lyrics He Left Behind

Diary of a Broken Mind, by Anne Moss Rogers, is not an early grief recovery book but a later grief book, a memoir, that answers a lot of questions. The funniest, most popular kid in school, Charles Aubrey Rogers, suffered from depression and later addiction, then died by suicide. Diary of a Broken Mind focuses on the relatable story of what led to his suicide at age twenty and answers the “why” behind his addiction and this cause of death revealed through both a mother’s story and years of Charles’ published and unpublished song lyrics. The closing chapters focus on hope and healing– and how the author found her purpose and forgave herself.

MY SON… MY SON: A GUIDE TO HEALING AFTER DEATH, LOSS OR SUICIDE BY IRIS BOLTON

In 1983, this book was groundbreaking. Iris Bolton is now in her 80s but her book is relevant still. At bottom, life and death are our greatest teachers–if we shall but listen. Iris Bolton’s personal story of her son’s suicide is a deeply moving, poignant one. It is a story of both a devastating tragedy and an exquisite triumph–and the agonizing, relentless, conflicted process connecting these two oppositional pulls. Until recently, we have chosen to keep death in the shadows and separated from the light of life. As a result, we have made ourselves more vulnerable to its pain and destruction. That this is true is well documented in this book.

A Broken Heart Still Beats: After Your Child Dies  by Anne McCracken and Mary Semel

Organized by a journalist and a psychotherapist, each of whom has lost a child, this book is a remarkable compilation of poetry, fiction, and essays about the pain, stages of grief, and the coping and healing process that follows the death of one’s child.  While nothing can mute the pain of such a life-shattering loss, others who know this experience can help those suffering articulate the chaos of their feelings and see that they can, eventually, feel whole again.

When a child dies: Stories of Survival and Hope by Richard Hipps

Recommended by Emotionally Naked contributor, Lloyd Braswell,  who lost a special needs child and later lost a son to suicide. The book is ten chapters, each written by a bereaved parent. When a Child Dies gives help and encouragement based on the reality of God’s love and covenant with God’s children. Written from the heart by parents who know firsthand the pain that follows the loss of a child, these intensely personal stories will help grieving parents deal with life after the child they loved so deeply suffers an untimely death.

Tomorrow Was Yesterday: Explosive First-Person Indictments of the US Mental Health System— Mothers Across the Nation Tell It Like It Is by Dede Ranahan

This book includes a story about an Emotionally Naked tribe member’s loss. Nautilus Book Awards 2020 Silver Medalist winner. In these snapshots from on-going sagas, you’ll read about grim realities — terrible group homes, suicides, adult children killed by police, incarcerations, solitary confinement, lack of beds, family chaos, substance abuse, ineffective medications, heart-breaking HIPAA restrictions, hallucinations, homelessness, sorrow, hurt, and anger. Simultaneously, you’ll read about profound love, caregiving, gratitude, forgiveness, hope, strength, persistence, resilience, generosity, leadership, courage, pursuing dreams, understanding, and heroism.

Rock On: Mining for Joy in the Deep River of Grief by susan e. Casey

★Top Recommendation. I read this when it was in manuscript form and I know how few books there are on sibling loss. Rock On focuses solely on sibling loss because it’s a tragedy author Susan E. Casey experienced in her own life. On Valentine’s Day, 2014, she learned of the horrific and unexpected death of her forty-three-year-old brother Rocky (birth name: Brian) who died while in Hong Kong with his wife and three-and-a-half-year-old daughter.

In the second half of the book, the author segues into several excerpts from the people she talked to that are relevant to the theme of each chapter. Each person she interviewed for these excerpts has a sibling who died a different way: overdose, suicide, accident, heart disease, murder, cancer and more. Susan weaves in her memories throughout each story and ends each chapter with her thoughts on the chapter’s theme to provide additional insights to help the reader on their grief journey. So this is a good self-help guide to acknowledging sibling grief, managing the pain and finding hope and meaning after sibling loss.

Signs: The Secret Language of the UniversE- By Laura Lynn Jackson

Many who lose someone they love find solace in a book about the afterlife and this one has been read and loved by many emotionally naked tribe members. I didn’t personally get into this one, not because of the subject matter but because I didn’t trust the author that much, and the writing had a lot of cliches which drives me nuts. The author’s goal is able to bring the mystical into the everyday. She relates stories of people who have experienced uncanny revelations and instances of unexplained synchronicity, as well as others drawn from her own experience. There’s the lost child who appears to his mother as a deer that approaches her unhesitatingly at a highway rest stop; the name written on a dollar bill that lets a terrified wife know that her husband will be okay; the Elvis Presley song that arrives at the exact moment of Jackson’s own father’s passing; and many others.

Bearing the Unbearable: Love, Loss, and the Heartbreaking Path of Grief by Joanne Cacciatore

★Top Recommendation. This one has come recommended by many people. When a loved one dies, the pain of loss can feel unbearable—especially in the case of a traumatizing death. The process of grieving can feel wild and nonlinear—and often lasts for much longer than other people, the non-bereaved, tell us it should. Organized into fifty-two short chapters, this book serves as a companion for life’s most difficult times, revealing how grief can open our hearts to connection, compassion, and the essence of shared humanity.

Grief Works: Stories of Life, Death, and Surviving

Especially illuminating in its coverage of how people cope with different kinds of losses is, “Grief Works: Stories of Life, Death and Surviving,” by Julia Samuel, who works with bereaved families both in private practice and at England’s National Health Service, at St. Mary’s hospital, Paddington.

It’s OK That You’re Not OK: Meeting Grief and Loss in a Culture That Doesn’t Understand by Megan Devine

Book recommended by Gray Maher, a contributor here on Emotionally Naked. Why does our culture treat grief like a disease to be cured as quickly as possible? In this book, Megan Devine offers a profound new approach to both the experience of grief and the way we try to help others who have endured tragedy. Having experienced grief from both sides—as both a therapist and as a woman who witnessed the accidental drowning of her beloved partner—Megan writes with deep insight about the unspoken truths of loss, love, and healing. Podcasts.

Flowing with the Go A Jiu-Jitsu Journey of the Soul by Elena Stowell

Winner of three awards this book is the story of one woman’s path through grief. For what seemed like a lifetime and probably was, the author wandered aimlessly in a personal prison of self-doubt and lack of purpose after her fifteen-year-old daughter Carly died suddenly before her eyes. By some combination of miracle and necessity, she walked into a Seattle area Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu gym. Through that experience and others that followed, Elena discovered the tenets of the martial art form and healing were the same. Ripping, raw honesty and refreshing balance of humor and introspection.

When Bad Things Happen to Good People by Rabbi Harold S. Kushner

If you are struggling with your faith after loss, this one is for you. This is a classic I read in 1987, the year after my friend Kathryn Ray Ashford died from cancer.It is a #1 bestselling inspirational classic and source of solace and hope for over 4 million readers.When Harold Kushner’s three-year-old son was diagnosed with a degenerative disease that meant the boy would only live until his early teens, he was faced with one of life’s most difficult questions: Why, God? Years later, Rabbi Kushner wrote this straightforward, elegant contemplation of the doubts and fears that arise when tragedy strikes.

A Time to Grieve: Meditations for Healing After the Death of a Loved One by Carol Staudacher

Classic. A collection of truly comforting, down-to-earth thoughts and meditations — including the authentic voices of survivors — for anyone grieving the loss of a loved one.