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Sorting through grandparent’s memories

My mother-in-law and father-in-law had four boys and they had seven grandchildren. They now have six since Charles’ death by suicide. Each of the Rogers’ boys got a box of pictures, mostly of the grandchildren and this was our box. So much nostalgia.

Charles spent a lot of time in Georgia with his Meemaw and Grandpa. Over the years, both boys spent a week with grandparents in addition to the week we spent at the beach. In fact, Charles went to Georgia after he was expelled from Wasatch for his second drug infraction just three weeks before graduation.

I had told him that he couldn’t come home until he graduated and they had made it possible for him to finish his diploma online. I knew if he came home, he would not follow through. He was so close, we had spent so much, and they offered.

They made sure he got that work done and got his degree.

He came back one more time. When the police visited my home in Chesterfield and we found out he had sold Randy’s grandfather’s silver dollars and my silver to pawn shops, we didn’t know what to do at first and needed time to collect our thoughts and decide what was next.

Again, Myra and Richard (meemaw and grandpa) made the suggestion that he come down there while we figured it out. All of us were naive. None of us knew he was addicted to heroin. He called me from Georgia on his twentieth birthday to tell me he had gotten addicted to opiates. He never admitted to heroin.

To us, he objected strongly. But he told his grandmother that some of his happiest times were in Georgia. Unfortunately, and to our shock, he went into withdrawal while with his grandparents.

Looking through all that history took me back. It triggers memories I forgot and new stories we had forgotten about both boys.

Published by

Anne Moss Rogers

I am an emotionally naked mental health speaker, and author of the Book, Diary of a Broken Mind and co-author with Kim O'Brien PhD, LICSW of Emotionally Naked: A Teacher's Guide to Preventing Suicide and Recognizing Students at Risk. I raised two boys, Richard and Charles, and lost my younger son, Charles to addiction and suicide on June 5, 2015. I help people foster a culture of connection to prevent suicide, reduce substance misuse and find life after loss. My motivational mental health keynotes, training and workshop topics include suicide prevention, addiction, mental illness, anxiety, coping strategies/resilience, and grief. As talented and funny as Charles was, letting other people know they matter was his greatest gift. And now the legacy I try and carry forward in my son's memory. Mental Health Speakers Website. Trained in ASIST and trainer for the evidence-based 4-hour training for everyone called safeTALK.

6 thoughts on “Sorting through grandparent’s memories”

  1. What wonderful, supportive grandparents! Such a blessing. I imagine their grief is also great, and perhaps overlooked (by society, not you!). I’m thankful they have a treasure chest of memories to draw from when grief comes. The time they invested in the boys’ lives is so important for all… ❤️

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