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Do men love their children less?

At my Families Anonymous group, I saw just as many men as women cry over the addiction of a child.  I felt honored the men in this group felt it “safe” enough to allow themselves to express themselves emotionally.

Because grief is the result of losing someone you love, men would have to love their children less to feel less grief. I believe dads love their children just as much as moms do. I know my husband hurts as much from the loss of our son by suicide as I do.

Yet often we think of men as “stronger” which therefore must mean they are not as predisposed to feeling the pain of grief.  They may express differently but it’s crazy to believe their children mean less to them.

Some men do keep it bottled up, often remaining bitter and sad and not ever finding joy in life again after the death of a child. I think a lot of that has to do with that lack of support men receive and not allowing them to express their pain.

Think a minute about the reaction you might have toward a teenage girl who comes to you crying versus a teenage boy. I believe it’s our attitude toward males and emotion that is one of the reasons we see more males die by suicide.

Of the more than 3,000 in Australia who died by suicide in 2015, 2,292 were men. Because suicide rates for Australian men has risen so high, there are multiple campaigns to address this public health crisis. This one below, “Have the Balls to Cry,” gives men permission to cry to release their pain.

Kira, one of my co-workers shared this with me not too long ago. As an advertising professional and a mental health and suicide prevention advocate, I think it rocks. It’s worth a one minute look.

Read more: It takes balls to cry

Published by

Anne Moss Rogers

I am an emotionally naked TEDx speaker, and author of the Book, Diary of a Broken Mind and co-author with Kim O'Brien PhD, LICSW of Emotionally Naked: A Teacher's Guide to Preventing Suicide and Recognizing Students at Risk. I raised two boys, Richard and Charles, and lost my younger son, Charles to substance use disorder and suicide on June 5, 2015. I help people foster a culture of connection to prevent suicide, reduce substance misuse and find life after loss. My motivational, training and workshop topics include suicide prevention, addiction, mental illness, coping strategies/resilience, and grief. As talented and funny as Charles was, letting other people know they matter was his greatest gift. And now the legacy I try and carry forward in my son's memory. Professional Speaker Website. Trained in ASIST and trainer for the evidence-based 4-hour training for everyone called safeTALK.

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